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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Dreamingdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: giver_of_death
    Elite Ratio:    4.09 - 106/72/18
    Words: 172
    Class/Type: Lyrics/
    Total Views: 773
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1069



    Description:
       Anything to make this better is what I'm after.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsDreamingdots
    -------------------------------------------


    (v1)
    you have your perfect family
    Your parents don't even like me
    They don't want you to be my friend
    ...I wonder why
    And I am trying my best
    To fit in with the rest of you
    ..Its hard
    (pc)
    I'm standing here..crying.My whold world is dying....

    If I were you and you were me you would finally understand
    Why I cry through the night and why I'm sometimes so sad
    But that will never happen so I guess I should stop...Dreaming
    (v2)
    And so I sit here with a knife to my throat
    And all I am to you is just a mote
    ...a piece of nothing
    I slowly tie a rope aroundmy neck
    I can't live much longer I am a wreck
    ...Whats the point
    (pc)

    (v3)
    All the screaming and yelling going on around me its easy to see why I wanna end this life so early...In a hurry...
    I keep thinkning about suicide I am falling to pieces in side...I can't hide..
    (pc)
    (pause)




    Submitted on 2005-08-11 09:27:28     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      great job surah!!! its rlly good i luv it, hell i understand wat u mean, i think alot of us have gone through the sme thing or at least something close to it and i al,most cried wen i read this is rememinded me of a personal experience it was really good
    | Posted on 2006-11-11 00:00:00 | by panzyrocker | [ Reply to This ]
      And so I sit here with a knife to my throat
    And all I am to you is just a mote
    ...a piece of nothing
    I slowly tie a rope aroundmy neck
    I can't live much longer I am a wreck
    ...Whats the point

    ... i like it . it has a very well environment . it makes me think inn every passage of what you wrote
    so keep on writing ..
    peace and love .. and
    take care!
    victor!
    | Posted on 2006-01-05 00:00:00 | by vitoko | [ Reply to This ]
      Wow. I'm sorry, but I can't think of anything that could make this better. I love it the way it is. It's so sad. The wording is great. Very creative. Great job

    -nikkki
    | Posted on 2005-08-13 00:00:00 | by Liv2LoveThePain | [ Reply to This ]
      There's not a whole lot that I think could make this better. What kind of music are you intending to put this to? I have a Green Day type melody going through my head here...that could be way off, but I like this. It is a bit sad, but you did a great job of conveying feelings and it's something that a lot of people can relate to and understand. Your lyrics are good and encourage you to keep going. Great job!
    Candi
    | Posted on 2005-08-13 00:00:00 | by dreamweaver | [ Reply to This ]


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