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    dots Submission Name: Private Talkdots

    Author: solitary_cross
    ASL Info:    19/female/Philippines
    Elite Ratio:    3.4 - 92/107/24
    Words: 155
    Class/Type: Poetry/Passion
    Total Views: 1285
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1072

       The art of anger transforming into love.

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsPrivate Talkdots

    His eyes against her depth
    Their solitary feet
    On the same mutual land
    Where time is insignificant

    The warmth of his breath
    Like steam over untouched glass
    Fogging her innocence
    Grasping him for dear life

    She would have pushed him away
    Denied him of the flame
    But her lips caught fever
    Trembling under his gaze

    He hated how her face glowed
    Amidst their heated state
    The way she thrashed her arms
    Facing his steady frame

    Strength was slowly dissipating
    Her consciousness at the brink
    She was diving into his spell
    A total submission to him

    His dry lips drew a smile
    And he knew it was coming
    A single touch on the surface
    Would send her to deafening silence

    A sigh of deliverance
    Released by her weakening breath
    Not a word, not a sound
    A touch of two entities

    Molded as one again.

    Submitted on 2005-08-12 07:46:24     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    Rate This Submission

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    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      I liked the way you made everything go togethere is was a fun read.
    | Posted on 2006-08-14 00:00:00 | by Fadeintoreality | [ Reply to This ]
      well this was good and then it wasnt good. i dont know just the topic was a weird one. and it didnt really seem like these peoples anger turned into love. it seemed more like a make-up or something. for a while this all seemed about his anger and he was/did abuse her. there wasnt much emotion in here. so maybe adding that would make it better too. you should probably put more in the ending too like add on to it.

    | Posted on 2005-08-12 00:00:00 | by Day DreaMeR | [ Reply to This ]

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