Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Evening Newsdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Emma_closes
    Elite Ratio:    4.28 - 88/111/44
    Words: 110
    Class/Type: Poetry/Venting
    Total Views: 988
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 837



    Description:
       Sometimes I get a bit too passionate over very common place things. This is an example of one of those moments. The evening news sent me into a tizzy and this poem resulted.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsEvening Newsdots
    -------------------------------------------


    Politics and poverty
    are ringing in the bathroom mirror
    because apparently
    indifference is not accepted.


    My TV tells me
    "He tried to kill a man
    but his gun jammed."
    Guess it just wasn't his time.
    Alleluia he's alive!
    Thank god that guy didn't die!


    Though, between you and I
    I'll forget this story by tomorrow
    and so well you.
    His poor girlfriend's sorrow
    will be just yesterday's news.


    Because indifference
    is unaccepted
    and society is expected
    to be something just as laughable
    as it is damnable.
    By tomorrow you'll be in a rage
    over some new dead bastard
    who was half that man's age.




    Submitted on 2005-08-13 18:07:46     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      hi

    I really liked this poem
    I often wonder why the media always plays off of negativity
    dont they realize that a story about someone who showed true compassion and love would bring joy and happiness to others
    Do they not care
    My grandpa told me long ago tv was all about money and sadly he was right
    Take Care
    Ron


    Please if you have a chance take a look at some of my poetry and let me know what you think
    Thank You
    Ron
    | Posted on 2005-11-08 00:00:00 | by Ronswords | [ Reply to This ]
      hmm, i get the poltical/social point you're making. its true you have to be seen to care whetehr you do or not. you highlight the ever present debasement of society. and it is a good poem and more importantly a thought provoking poem in terms of content. however its not nessesarily poetry. its more statement, or seems to be to me.

    i like your rhyming however its not forced and makes the piece flow extremely well. also the ending fo this poem has a brillaint ring to it. you also manage to encorparte societies obsession wiht youth inot this poem. i just think it lakcs a little personla invovlement posisbly? it sounds more like its being narrated posisbly. i dunno anyway good job especially the message.
    harri
    | Posted on 2005-08-13 00:00:00 | by harri | [ Reply to This ]
      Hi there,
    For someone so young, you express with maturity. BKA...your head is on right.
    You told it like it is. Yes the news can make a person react in different ways. Especially when someone young is killed. Overall, this is a good write! take care, wanda
    | Posted on 2005-08-14 00:00:00 | by bigfineq | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    70445

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    The World written by jjd
    Beauty Rest written by jackz
    A Thousand Reflections written by endlessgame23
    The Want written by Daniel Barlow
    The Curtain Call written by faideddarkness
    Vortex: The Imagination That Is written by KeeperOfLight
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth written by endlessgame23
    Keep written by TheStillSilence
    A Sense Of Things written by Daniel Barlow
    Reliquary of Writ written by HisNameIsNoMore
    The Abyss of Love written by poetotoe
    Compartments written by TheStillSilence
    (Untitled Song) written by TeslaKoyal
    Honeymoon written by TheStillSilence
    Day 6 written by TheStillSilence
    Dream written by closetpoet
    To the Artist written by HisNameIsNoMore
    None the Wiser written by endlessgame23
    no sky on the other side written by teika5
    A Worsening Effect written by Daniel Barlow
    Loop-di-Loop written by endlessgame23
    Snippet written by Daniel Barlow
    Hyle written by endlessgame23
    Deep written by Janesaddiction
    The Human Harmonic written by Daniel Barlow
    When Sirens Whisper written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Sword in the Water written by Wolfwatching
    Relentless. The Visceral Fracture. written by Daniel Barlow
    Meaningless Meanings written by ForgottenGraves
    // Seasonal Song written by ShadowParadox

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry