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Author: kittycampbel
ASL Info:    23 male uganda
Elite Ratio:    3.55 - 53 /72 /25
Words: 230
Class/Type: Poetry /Love
Total Views: 854
Average Vote:    No vote yet.
Bytes: 1329


It's a love poem enough to make lyrics. just to ease your mind. Hope some body likes it!
A win-some smile could lure anyone


My love though hidden overflows
My heart bursts into flowers with love
At the recalling of your name
You to me is like the site of dew-moistened leaves smelling the freshness of morning
You, have I loved a thousand times countlessly...
You are the world I live in
Your lips my well from where I drink the sufficient drink of the creator
Everyday I am with you
Am like the proverbial stranger at the crossroads
With whom you let yourself go into magical-dancing on moon-lit-nights
You are one of your kind!
So charmed, beautifully shaped above all
With a win-some smile.
But you are far from me like --- to the skies
You have my heart, I confess
Met we once trembling with Emotions
struggling with fear and pleasure
Your the one I see so many times in my dreams
Capable of giving me rainy nights in my bed
The sores on my heart are too deep yet fresh
That I even recall my first murmurs of love....

Here in my room
I would love you quietly until morning comes
But like the tongue sorrounded by teeth,
My love is guarded, Yes you are!
The pains I get loving a BIG-MAN's daughter
Yet your smile gives me hope.

Submitted on 2005-08-15 04:01:38     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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  Enough for lyrics? Well if not too inconvienient, my view of lyrics is that it is less poetic, unless the lyrics are a foreign language, in which case they come out poetic. I mean, your second line: "my heart bursts into flowers with love" is a gem of poetry, lovely imagery but as lyrics, it just wouldn't sound right, to me anyway. Not to say that this didnt' work as a poem, which it certainly did, and it also succeeded in easing my mind. Nice work.
| Posted on 2005-08-15 00:00:00 | by JimweiZERO | [ Reply to This ]
  Ahhhhh...the feeling of being in love! There is so much emotion bursting out of this it's unreal! I don't know how it would be for lyrics, it's almost way to "deep" for lyrics. That's not really coming across as I want it to, but I don't know exactly how to explain what I mean.
For a love poem, it's terrific. This warmed my heart in so many ways. You did a great job!
| Posted on 2005-08-15 00:00:00 | by dreamweaver | [ Reply to This ]
  Love is an amazing thing.. I liked the metaphore you used a bout the tounge and teeth! Thats something I have never heard before, but It makes a lot of sense!

Some sentences were worded a little differently for my taste.. But Its probably because a lot of people don't arrange their words like that. But originality gets you extra points, ya know?? Lol.. Good Job..

Keep it up

~Much Love from Me to You~
| Posted on 2005-08-15 00:00:00 | by Blindly-N-Love | [ Reply to This ]
  You have a wonderful way with expressing your thoughts in words. This is a beautifully written love poem from the heart. Every word chosen in sincerety. I too, thought the teeth and tongue part was good and original, a nice touch.
The last part about the BIG MAN'S daughter.. was unigue as well.
Hope it works out for you. Take care, Samuel.

| Posted on 2005-08-15 00:00:00 | by Intricate1 | [ Reply to This ]

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