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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Cancer Ridden Snakedots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: lori_tab
    ASL Info:    27/f/alabama
    Elite Ratio:    4.33 - 1752/1517/481
    Words: 101
    Class/Type: Misc/Angry
    Total Views: 894
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 633



    Description:
       Just kinda pissed off right now.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsCancer Ridden Snakedots
    -------------------------------------------


    born in the year of the snake
    on your belly you crawl
    hiding between blades of glass that I love
    lure me in
    and bite me
    let me win
    and kill me

    born as every kind of cancer
    hard shell
    filled thick with disease
    a disease that you push through my skin
    with poison fangs
    lies you use to win

    born only to hate
    born only to fill this world with charmful lies
    your only use to abuse
    your purpose soley to hurt
    to hate
    to pull the hate in me
    filthy snake
    cancerous boy of lies




    Submitted on 2005-08-16 13:20:25     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      Wow...its about Justin isn't it? What happened to you two? He wont tell me much about it...
    I liked this poem a lot...the title is eye catching and I can feel the emotion that went into it...reading it made me want to be all like...'yeah you stupid cancerous snake...'
    I liked this poem a lot...very good job my friend...
    So you may get out of Tennessee...YAY...bestest of wishes..I pray for you friend...

    ...jessie...
    | Posted on 2005-08-19 00:00:00 | by jessie thomas | [ Reply to This ]
      Oh HELL YEAH! U go. A excellant choice of verbage to describe your anger. I loved the connection betweencancer and snakes. Two completely differant entities yet both despised. He musta really peed u off.
    very nicely done
    your friend
    ben
    | Posted on 2005-08-16 00:00:00 | by BenCollier | [ Reply to This ]
      This is one of the better poems i have read lately. I think the metaphore of the snake and a guy is brilliant. Guys are typically known as being snakes i my self have slithered in the grass before and you made the comparison orinal. I like how you used the zodiac, an animal, and a disease to describe someone who has brought you trouble. All the basics are great: meter, structure and flow, they all combind in harmanoy to make a wonderfull poem.
    | Posted on 2005-08-16 00:00:00 | by robertbwell | [ Reply to This ]
      cancerous boy of lies... i love this line it was a great way to end a very ulluring poem. I cant say i have ever pictured a man as a snake... plenty of women, but not men. either way I know the intention of men is sometimes to hurt you and then haunt you forever within your dreams. talk to you later, ella
    | Posted on 2005-08-16 00:00:00 | by stormyskye | [ Reply to This ]
      I think this poem described me perfectly the only thing i want to do to you is make you hurt.Im such a horrible person,but your no better you use me for your own personal gain and i let you.lol.You just wish you were a snake.[censored]
    | Posted on 2005-08-22 00:00:00 | by The Crow | [ Reply to This ]


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