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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: untitleddots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Seedofbayne
    ASL Info:    19/M/MA
    Elite Ratio:    3.37 - 55/82/27
    Words: 87
    Class/Type: Poetry/Venting
    Total Views: 274
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 553



    Description:
       idc do whatever


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsuntitleddots
    -------------------------------------------


    The love I had was not enough
    to satisfy your unfaithful lust
    you said in hints
    what i yelled aloud
    to this thought i wince
    undedicated, not proud

    at the beginning, together we were fine
    near the end you finally tell me your mine
    as i fight the tears
    and arrest my fears
    and the dawning end finally nears

    its dedicated to you and no one else
    underneath all the bruises and welts
    i understand now and its true
    i kinda sorta fucking hate you




    Submitted on 2005-08-16 18:21:29     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      The ending caught me off guard. I thought that this piece would end with something kinda mushy. Not so. This is good, with an honest ending. I can't say much to make it better. It's pretty good as is.
    | Posted on 2005-08-16 00:00:00 | by Dark Angel | [ Reply to This ]
      This is such a gooooooood poem and the ending is...ummm...really...strong and is used really well. I liked it keep it up.

    -Christina
    | Posted on 2005-08-16 00:00:00 | by POETRY | [ Reply to This ]
      cant u b satissfied with me sayn sorry a million times...n i explaind it as best as i could n i love you michael damien hughes.. n i no u told me not to read this but i dont follow orders well ;)
    | Posted on 2005-08-16 00:00:00 | by scardnscared | [ Reply to This ]



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