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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Jesusdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: lynn7
    ASL Info:    43/ St. Augustine, FL
    Elite Ratio:    3.38 - 419/288/103
    Words: 73
    Class/Type: Prose/Love
    Total Views: 971
    Average Vote:    5.0000
    Bytes: 449



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsJesusdots
    -------------------------------------------


    only you know
    that day
    is today
    when the words
    swoop and sway
    when the heart
    finally lets go
    of a world
    now lost
    have not forgotten
    that you
    set my heart
    a blaze
    wake me up
    to another day
    take this life
    its given to you
    as a sacrifice
    a token
    of true love
    for
    only you know





    Submitted on 2005-08-21 00:01:39     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      Really good poem. MAYBE a little choppy but for the most part a great poem Gods love truely has the power to set ones heart " ablaze"

    James
    | Posted on 2006-07-08 00:00:00 | by James Reyna | [ Reply to This ]
      This is very beautiful and so well written, There is nothing like The love we recieve from Jesus and you have captured it just as it is I really do love this one and I will add it to my Favs.


    Ladymustang
    | Posted on 2006-06-12 00:00:00 | by LadyMustang | [ Reply to This ]
      Lynn,

    This piece is so beautiful. Not many people can write about Jesus. It has inspired me to to attempt to write about him. I love how you acknowledge him and reverance him within the poem. I love how you humble yourself to him and remind him how he touched your heart or as the poem say, "set my heart ablaze". You wrote this poem as if you where writing it to him or speaking to him. Great write Lady!
    | Posted on 2006-01-10 00:00:00 | by B-Gentle | [ Reply to This ]
      excellent! this poem was well written and i think that writing about jesus can sometimes be a hard thing to do, but you did it.. and did it well. its very heartwarming. it was kind of hard to read though, because words are skipped, but other than that i like it!
    | Posted on 2005-11-29 00:00:00 | by roxygirl | [ Reply to This ]
      Beautiful
    absolutely Beautiful
    i love this poem it is a testament of how true and real our lords love is
    your use of the words you used was written perfect
    you express yourself very well
    i will definately be looking for more posts from you
    God Bless And Take Care Of Yourself
    | Posted on 2005-10-07 00:00:00 | by Ronswords | [ Reply to This ]
      BEAUTIFUL!!!!! the mood was skillfully kept and the expressions are genuine. Amid all this hurricane stuff, this one reminds me of home when iwas with my immediate family: on a personal note, thankyou.

    Critique: Would periods help or hurt in this case?
    | Posted on 2005-09-23 00:00:00 | by Dalja | [ Reply to This ]
      Ooooh hey this is such a beautiful piece...Its an astute tribute to the most loved man of all times...What a better way for one to express their gratitude by conversing the beautiful emotions felt by one's heart...There's so much wonder in this piece, not neccesarily because He is an epitome of unconditional love, but for me He is an incredible soul who literally practiced what he preached...Moreover, my heart was so cleansed after meditating on this piece...This write has such a soothing mood to it...It has that emancipatory element to it...I am just wowed by your beautiful thoughts...In as much as many would find reasons to criticise or keep their thoughts on this type of work...I am in no positions to criticize this piece...Moroever, I appreciated how you conversed your thoughts...they set the tone for this piece...They marvelously emphasise whats in your heart...SUCH A HEART WARMING PIECE...A great way to start my day...Its a blessed encounter to have read through this divine work...An incredible read...Thank you for pouring out your heart on this one!Be happy...Nobantu
    | Posted on 2005-08-30 00:00:00 | by Nobantu | [ Reply to This ]
      Religion is a hard subject to write about. This particular piece is choppy and sparatic. It makes it hard to understand. you break up the words for no aparent reason. What message are you trying to convey? I'm a bit lost. I understand the universal idea of your love for jesus but other than thatI'm like Huh? unless that is youonly message. Help me out here. I suggetst a rewrite.

    -Janese
    | Posted on 2005-08-24 00:00:00 | by Chi-Town Rose | [ Reply to This ]


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