Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Jesusdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: lynn7
    ASL Info:    43/ St. Augustine, FL
    Elite Ratio:    3.38 - 419/288/103
    Words: 73
    Class/Type: Prose/Love
    Total Views: 1084
    Average Vote:    5.0000
    Bytes: 449



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsJesusdots
    -------------------------------------------


    only you know
    that day
    is today
    when the words
    swoop and sway
    when the heart
    finally lets go
    of a world
    now lost
    have not forgotten
    that you
    set my heart
    a blaze
    wake me up
    to another day
    take this life
    itís given to you
    as a sacrifice
    a token
    of true love
    for
    only you know





    Submitted on 2005-08-21 00:01:39     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      Really good poem. MAYBE a little choppy but for the most part a great poem Gods love truely has the power to set ones heart " ablaze"

    James
    | Posted on 2006-07-08 00:00:00 | by James Reyna | [ Reply to This ]
      This is very beautiful and so well written, There is nothing like The love we recieve from Jesus and you have captured it just as it is I really do love this one and I will add it to my Favs.


    Ladymustang
    | Posted on 2006-06-12 00:00:00 | by LadyMustang | [ Reply to This ]
      Lynn,

    This piece is so beautiful. Not many people can write about Jesus. It has inspired me to to attempt to write about him. I love how you acknowledge him and reverance him within the poem. I love how you humble yourself to him and remind him how he touched your heart or as the poem say, "set my heart ablaze". You wrote this poem as if you where writing it to him or speaking to him. Great write Lady!
    | Posted on 2006-01-10 00:00:00 | by B-Gentle | [ Reply to This ]
      excellent! this poem was well written and i think that writing about jesus can sometimes be a hard thing to do, but you did it.. and did it well. its very heartwarming. it was kind of hard to read though, because words are skipped, but other than that i like it!
    | Posted on 2005-11-29 00:00:00 | by roxygirl | [ Reply to This ]
      Beautiful
    absolutely Beautiful
    i love this poem it is a testament of how true and real our lords love is
    your use of the words you used was written perfect
    you express yourself very well
    i will definately be looking for more posts from you
    God Bless And Take Care Of Yourself
    | Posted on 2005-10-07 00:00:00 | by Ronswords | [ Reply to This ]
      BEAUTIFUL!!!!! the mood was skillfully kept and the expressions are genuine. Amid all this hurricane stuff, this one reminds me of home when iwas with my immediate family: on a personal note, thankyou.

    Critique: Would periods help or hurt in this case?
    | Posted on 2005-09-23 00:00:00 | by Dalja | [ Reply to This ]
      Ooooh hey this is such a beautiful piece...Its an astute tribute to the most loved man of all times...What a better way for one to express their gratitude by conversing the beautiful emotions felt by one's heart...There's so much wonder in this piece, not neccesarily because He is an epitome of unconditional love, but for me He is an incredible soul who literally practiced what he preached...Moreover, my heart was so cleansed after meditating on this piece...This write has such a soothing mood to it...It has that emancipatory element to it...I am just wowed by your beautiful thoughts...In as much as many would find reasons to criticise or keep their thoughts on this type of work...I am in no positions to criticize this piece...Moroever, I appreciated how you conversed your thoughts...they set the tone for this piece...They marvelously emphasise whats in your heart...SUCH A HEART WARMING PIECE...A great way to start my day...Its a blessed encounter to have read through this divine work...An incredible read...Thank you for pouring out your heart on this one!Be happy...Nobantu
    | Posted on 2005-08-30 00:00:00 | by Nobantu | [ Reply to This ]
      Religion is a hard subject to write about. This particular piece is choppy and sparatic. It makes it hard to understand. you break up the words for no aparent reason. What message are you trying to convey? I'm a bit lost. I understand the universal idea of your love for jesus but other than thatI'm like Huh? unless that is youonly message. Help me out here. I suggetst a rewrite.

    -Janese
    | Posted on 2005-08-24 00:00:00 | by Chi-Town Rose | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    71422

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Sunt Mala Quae Libas written by MyPeriodical
    Limbo written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Summer Nights written by ollie_wicked
    This written by Chelebel
    Can't let my demons go written by faideddarkness
    Commencement written by Ramneet
    On Top of a Water Wheel written by Wolfwatching
    I'm here written by BloodtornAngel
    Bam written by Daniel Barlow
    untitled written by Chelebel
    On Loop written by Daniel Barlow
    Incubus written by monad
    The First Time written by Wolfwatching
    Munyonyo written by expiring_touch
    Cage written by distortedcloud
    To the King written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Stretto written by saartha
    Hopelessly Blind written by ForgottenGraves
    Love and Solitaire written by HisNameIsNoMore
    When Crows Tick on Windows written by metallichick786
    Convergence written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Hollow Points written by RequiemOfDreams
    It's been a while written by Sharati_hottie
    A Fire! A Knife! A Black Crow Calls! written by HisNameIsNoMore
    4th Season of Vivaldi written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Wasps written by Wolfwatching
    Still written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Date night written by expiring_touch
    Genesis written by saartha
    Dirge of Nostalgia written by HisNameIsNoMore

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry