I must say I have to agree with you. First love always seems to stay with you throughout the years even though sometimes you may be far apart. I believe that in a sense that first love was like great love and will always be with you. But what is great love compared to forever love?
This was a very wonderful write Candi. Keep up the good work and blessed and most wonderful day and God bless. Thanks so much for sharing.
It was such a delight to meditate on this write..Its written with so much sincerity and the words really cement the entire piece...Aaaaah who can ever forget that first time..Yeah I recalled the first day the jone for poetry grew inside of me..The first peom I ever became infuated with was the Daffodil...eversince then...everything just fell into place...To this day, it still feels like the first time when I meditate on a wonderful piece...This piece made me feel exactly like that..Very moving poem...Ahhhhhhh thank u for sharing...Im so uplifted..BE HAPPY...Nobantu
Maybe this is what I needed to read? Maybe I was meant to read these words today? All I know is, this brought the tears, cleansing tears maybe? But tears all the same. This is a touching piece, especially for someone that has gone through such an experience. You described the feeling of leaving someone behind, but never leaving them for good, always keeping them with you, even if you know you shouldn't, you hit this head on. Thank you for sharing this, it helped more than you know.
Oh my gosh, have you stolen the words from my head? Just kidding, but really, every word...it was like an experience that I had..you spelled it out so nicely. I just can't even really find the words to say right now...this poem almost made me cry, but don't worry, that's not bad...it really touched me.
Hi. I like this poem because i feel it.. the pain that never goes away even when your over it. our past relationships are the ones that makes us succeed in our future ones. I thought of my old love just now and I wonder what the heck did I ever see in him. ...
This is a well-done poem. I like the emotional tone. My only nit is the stanzas seem to make it choppy to me; I really think you should be consistent (especially if you're going to rhyme). You might want to try this in free verse if you're going to leave it in this format. That takes some of the pressure off as far as structure.
dunno how i missed this one but im so glad i found it now.I envy your talents :p.Beautifully crafted words and meanings which you blend perfectly with a nice even flow making it an absolute joy to read.As you know i can relate to this i just wish i could have wrote mine as well :)im trying to be more critical as i read more and more,but not with this one its perfect to me and brings out the emotions of sadness and new hope,new love.im gonna have to add this to my favs also :) graham
I like the theme here. That was a great line to muse off of. So many will give your heart a background. If one could perform a heart background check...many of us would have a book of pages. This really was a great motivational write. Love can be let go...yet still reside in the background.
Hey great job on taking just a name and making a really pretty good poem. I like poems with one liners in them. I think it is cool. I generally write old style. 4 lines per stanza, 4 to 6 stanza's per poem. I never really got the hang of one liners, but I like reading them. This was actually really good. I liked themessage on loving, losing, and moving on. That is the way it is supposed to be. Not dwelling on "what might have been"
Ahhh...! Yes, how true! You never really do forget that first love do you? This is a lovely poem Candi! Very nicely written and full of deep emotions and sincerity! I like how you begin this with sadness and loss, moving on to acceptance and healing, then to moving forward to prosperity and happiness. Yet finishing this poem with a mention that this first love will remain in your heart...somewhere! Very nicely written! Take care!
very melancholy yet filled with hope for new love.. the old love will always have a place in the heart, for i believe that the gift of love, once given, never asks for return. you have risein to the challenge well! i have taken it on now too and will post mine shortly. taking on a writing challenge is always interesting and takes us to places we perhaps never thought before. thanks for sharing your version of this title, everyone has such a unique perspective. peace, ~Cat
Candi, this was just amazing and beautiful. magnicat has done one too and I told her that I was glad they weren't giving out awards for these poems because they'd have to give everyone one! you have done a spectacular job on this! I am almost at a loss for words because of the unexpected ending. I like how you saved that line until the end. I think it's better than mine! great job.
Candi, I saw magnicat's poem and am now seeking out all of the poems. I like the way you shake out of the depression to recreate yorself in this poem. I also find it amazing that much of the central themes are very much the same although everyone's signature style is very much present. I think I'll jump on the bandwagon. jan
Well, well, well...what a nice twist you put on it. I think this was a very good moving forward poem, cuz hey, the world moves forward so a person better move along with it to right?Good message, good structure and nice choice of words...the third stanza was mah-vel-usssss! Have a good one and keep smilin'
to let go is one of the things you have to do to get on with your life and be happier. this is a write of healing and i hope it serves you well. i too have let go of a special someone and im moving on even though my mind somewhere in the subconscious in not allowing me to fully heal from the pain of loss.
the first three lines show me the impact this person has/had on your mind. the next four lines deal with the heart and its pain. i like the harmony in it the mind and the heart toiling together. ok the chronology goes from the setting sun to dawn which leaves room for night in between so its a jump but not neccesarily a bad thing if one takes it all in mood and not concerning time itself. "My heart has now become the home of someone new" love that line immensely the new love what i would call new water in the springs something leaves but is replace with a better new and improved source of life and that is how it should be. old things should pass away to make room for "new love" you have said that this person will remain in the background of your heart that is a wonderful way to express how love has imprinted itself on you. great one Candi very touching. be proud you have come so far in your quest to sustain love for yourself and your present love. and i admire as always your courage to face your own "demons" best of hopes and blessings for you always, mike
Hmm...though this poem does seem a bit generic, it is worded quite well. My only real problem is my regular complaint...try and find some better, less common words. A thesaurus is a writer's best friend. The words that I specifically mean are: old, cold, happy, and strong. Other than that, I believe it's pretty good, but I have confidence that you can write better.
I like this poem. It shows your drive and determination to move on. Not to dwell in the past, but rather hold it close to your heart. Our past is the doorway to the future and you have chosen to move forward. Very nicely done. Carol