Hardly knew you

Author: POETRY ASL Info:    17/f/az Elite Ratio:    4.29 - 259 /141 /37 Words: 112

Class/Type: Misc /Love Total Views: 1569 Average Vote:    No vote yet. Bytes: 674

Description:

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Hardly knew you

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I hardly knew you but instantly I fell in love I was hanging on your every word you had ever said it makes me think that not all guys are the same You gave me hope To finally have true love once again because before i would just shelter myself in away from the world and everybody so they wouldnt hurt me everytime they opened their mouth. Baby you gave me everything I thought I no longer could recieve you are a part of what made me....me not being afraid to show it...you know. I guess thats why....I am very happy to say .....you are the biggest part of me

Submitted on 2005-08-24 19:27:20     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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Comments

Wow... Lucky guy, your words, your feelings, are a great pick me up I can see your smile. take care. Bobby K (aka) The Poorman's Poet.

| Posted on 2006-05-06 00:00:00 | by Bobby K | [ Reply to This ]

WOW...I feel really special right now and i'm glad that i make u feel that way...its also a really nice poem what makes me wonder though how long it take u to right this??? lol well ttyl Eric,

| Posted on 2005-08-24 00:00:00 | by Draco | [ Reply to This ]

I like this alot. It's very raw and honest. It didn't compare your love to anything, and it didn't elaborate, which might make it better, but I like it nonetheless. I can relate, but I'm sure you don't care. My only advice would be to elaborate and maybe say something about why you fell in love. Naver alone: Haley

| Posted on 2005-08-24 00:00:00 | by HECATE_Sservant | [ Reply to This ]

i will agree there was no over thought in this wich is fine because oit didnt need it at all it just made sence and was easy to relate too good work

| Posted on 2005-08-24 00:00:00 | by layDsayD | [ Reply to This ]

i think its really honest and off the cuff but i have to admit that i didnt like the start so much..its the same sort of thing that ive read so many times...so i guess im saying its cliché...however...i do love the end of it very much.. Baby you gave me everything I thought I no longer could recieve you are a part of what made me...me not being afraid to show it...you know. I guess thats why...I am very happy to say ...you are the biggest part of me and think that this has the makings of a fantastic piece not just a good one...if it had alittle more work...but thats just my view.. you have to be happy with your own stuff and sometimes its more important that its really personal to you...

| Posted on 2005-08-25 00:00:00 | by stormyskies | [ Reply to This ]

Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

1. Be honest. 2. Try not to give only compliments. 3. How did it make you feel? 4. Why did it make you feel that way? 5. Which parts? 6. What distracted from the piece?

7. What was unclear? 8. What does it remind you of? 9. How could it be improved? 10. What would you have done differently? 11. What was your interpretation of it? 12. Does it feel original?

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