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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Keep Walkingdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: manderz_1207
    ASL Info:    15/f/mi
    Elite Ratio:    5.45 - 95/109/38
    Words: 48
    Class/Type: Poetry/
    Total Views: 876
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 275



    Description:
       Some weird short poem I wrote.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsKeep Walkingdots
    -------------------------------------------


    Another day of hell goes by,
    as feelings are hurt and people cry.
    They put on their fake smiles,
    to make people think there happy for a while.
    They walk the halls and pass them by,
    no stopping, keep walking and don't say hi.




    Submitted on 2005-08-25 20:25:06     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

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    4: Pretty cool
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    ||| Comments |||
      i liked the fact that it was vague. it leaves room for a keep walking part 2. this happens to a lot of kids i used to be one of them. it was the point in my life when i thought everyone was better than me and their wa to point to my exictence. sadly enough im starting to revert back into that person.i also think that the fact that it was short added a little something more to it. i cant realy put my finger on it or elaborate but i think the length helps to bring your poin across even more. good write keep it up.

    ~Gena~
    | Posted on 2005-09-24 00:00:00 | by luvy | [ Reply to This ]
      Hey,
    Short and very vague. You could of expanded upon that. Being a teen is so frustrating especially when the people you look at don't say hi to you or they just dont want to recognize you. That must feel like crap. no offence. Just thinking if i was in your shoes.

    Must read a poem i wrote called where i come from. It kinda happened to me when i was small and i realized why it happened. Tell me if you agree. In a way it's a anti-discrimation poem but i'm sure in a way you can relate. Tell me what you think.

    Overall, you got an idea but you're not expanding on it. So much more can be said about it. I know you got that in you.

    Take care. Peace...Irina
    | Posted on 2005-08-26 00:00:00 | by charmedidentity | [ Reply to This ]
      Oh' to be a teen and not be heard. I like this b/c it sells your frustration of recognition. There is no attack, just a spit in the face so to speak as they walk by.

    If I have read this wrong then I am sorry.

    Good short bit.

    Wisdom Seeker
    | Posted on 2005-08-25 00:00:00 | by Wisdom Seeker | [ Reply to This ]


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