Description: Umm... I don't really know when I wrote this but I know that I was depressed and it's my guess that it was written after my break up with Matthew (who, at this point, noone gives a crap about). I have moved on though. I was just looking through my old song book and this fell out. Just uh... tell me what you think, what needs to be improved, and whatever else crosses your mind to say. But whatever you do COMMENT! Please and thank you.
Change is such a subtle thing
It comes and goes as it pleases
If only change were on my side
Then I wouldn't always run and hide
If our relationship went my way
You would have no choice but to stay
I liked my life how it was
So Change please change now just because
Now's driving me insane!
Hi Doe, I liked this poem – it has a nice flow to it and compels the reader (ie me) to think of change that I have endured (good and bad). Specific comments: * when I read your first line in isolation, my immediate reaction was, "Hey wait, not all change is subtle. Some of it is downright obvious and earth shattering." But then I read the second line and thought, "No, you're right. It is subtle in the way it comes and goes without any influence from me." Those lines gave "Change" a life of its own, as though we humans are merely pawns on its chess board – if we may even be so bold as to claim such a right. * "If only change was on my side" – Ah, it rarely is, even when we instigate it. So much so that there were so many directions the following line could have taken (eg, taking it in stride, swimming against the tide, etc.), but I think the natural reaction is, as you've point out, to run and hide. * Like others before me, I really liked the play on words in "So Change please change now just because" – it was really clever. Anyway, I know there is not much by way of feedback in my comments, but I thought I would share regardless. Thanks for the read! Cheers, TD
This is a very different poem btu I liked it. Glad to hear that you've moved on, we spend way too much time trying to keep the past instead of moving forward. I know I've been there. Anyways, this is something I can relate to and I bet others can too. Sometimes change seems like the worse thing in the world and yet it can be the best at the same time. we wish that we could make the changes that would be in the best interest for us, that would keep us happy and yet we can't make those changes. We can only make changes of ourselves and not of others. We try to make the other stay, if only we had control and could make them change there mind so that they would stay and we could be happy. But they wouldn't be happy and that would make us feel shame. We wish that we could change what's going on because what's happening now isn't what we want and yet we can't. Sorry that I wrote so much, just kept going. Hope that i'm on the right track with this one.