Description: Please notify me of any spelling mistakes. This only was quickly typed and I don't feel like reviewing it. If you want to know what this is about read my current journal entry.
Hands -------------------------------------------
Our hands
Are reaching
for each other
so close
Bodies sweating
From all the stress
All the desires
Fingers shaking
Unable to rest
Although
With all this effort
They never touch
We are never together
I am never loved
so far, both the poems that i have read by you (i forgot the name of the other one) were Awsome. i do agree with the comment below about the love thing, but i know somewhere that someone is waiting for a girl like you to come strolling along so they can sweep you off your feet. keep lookin. love your writing.
the entire piece is good on the whole, the only thing i can suggest to you is this... try to re-think the last line... unless you're saying that you are never loved BECAUSE you can't physically touch each other... i think that if these feelings are true, you are loved in a different way i guess... perhaps i'm wrong... oh yeah.... i didn't notice any spelling errors... - fifi
Submission Name: Hands
