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    dots Submission Name: Raven's Flightdots

    Author: Raivn
    ASL Info:    33/f/al
    Elite Ratio:    4.28 - 1222/916/231
    Words: 134
    Class/Type: Poetry/Dark
    Total Views: 704
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 941

       I really am not sure where this came from. I guess I was thinking of flying away from this situation.

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsRaven's Flightdots

    "Fly away!" he cried,
    "Fly far away from me!"
    Ruffled feathers fluttered in the air,
    Too dark for him to see.

    She took wing and flew,
    Far away, and fast,
    Before her tender, beating heart
    Could be taken and smashed.

    But somehow, her frenzied flight
    Brought her right back here,
    To the hands that knew her shape,
    And the arms that held her near.

    Her tender, precious heart,
    In peril again, from him,
    Accepted her master once more, and accordingly,
    Bent to his every whim.

    He took her body and used her,
    Clipped those incredible wings.
    He left her hurt and useless,
    A bird with no reason to sing.

    "Fly away!" he cried,
    "I want nothing more of this!"
    But her soul had taken wing.
    Her eyes were emptiness.

    Submitted on 2005-09-02 09:44:16     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    Rate This Submission

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    ||| Comments |||
      I really got into this write. I could feel her pain and sadness. But the last stanza throwed me off.

    Her eyes were emptiness.

    It sounded a bit forced to this lovely write. Other then that, I wouldn't change a thing.

    | Posted on 2005-09-03 00:00:00 | by illusions35904 | [ Reply to This ]
      Very creative and lots of imagination. Remember though, even wings that are clipped will grow again - someday ! Excellent write.
    | Posted on 2005-09-02 00:00:00 | by Frank Maguire | [ Reply to This ]

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