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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Biancadots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Beulah
    Elite Ratio:    4.78 - 588/414/44
    Words: 38
    Class/Type: Poetry/Love
    Total Views: 1008
    Average Vote:    5.0000
    Bytes: 311



    Description:
       My six year old daughter is truly amazing and I thought of trying to capture her soul through words... hope you can see her as I do.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsBiancadots
    -------------------------------------------


    love of my life
    little red-haired wonder
    healer of broken bones
    deep and
    unblinkingly wise
    tender and soft spoken
    giggler of note
    rhythmic and vibrant
    passionate and brave
    curious and smart
    daring and different
    my indigo child




    Submitted on 2005-09-03 11:17:43     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      Thank you for this poem it is soo beautiful :)
    | Posted on 2012-08-11 00:00:00 | by BiancaEls | [ Reply to This ]
      Well maybe its not fair to be there all the time and be aware how you care but .............I agree ..... she is all that and much much more. Take care.
    | Posted on 2008-01-10 00:00:00 | by Joachim | [ Reply to This ]
      This is too gorgeous. You have captured the soul and spirit of this little wonderous creature and painted it so exquisitely that she seems to come alive in front of my eyes... carefully glancing to see what I'm doing and ducking out of sight with a giggle when I look up. See how you get me all carried away :-)

    Wonderful word choice and vibrant images. Got to love it!
    | Posted on 2006-06-07 00:00:00 | by sugar-n-spice | [ Reply to This ]
      This was a well structured and simple write. Writes which are like this really get to the heart, simple yet detailed. Again, you fit in a lot of description with the use of few words and that marks a good writer. Another thing that I liked about this was the descriptive flow of it. Usually I am not a fan of constant description, but you managed it really well. *moves mouse towards favourtie button and clicks it.* Good job

    Abbas
    | Posted on 2006-06-07 00:00:00 | by abuzzbuzz92 | [ Reply to This ]
      This is wonderful. It is so hard to describe a child... they are so much more than words, but you've done an exceptional job. It made me smile and think of the brilliant children I know. Thanks for such a touching and pleasant read.
    Jessica
    | Posted on 2006-06-22 00:00:00 | by parabola | [ Reply to This ]
      Once again you've gotten your point across with an economy of words that's remarkably like a combination of haiku and Robert Frost. I can easily visualize your child bouncing around the house, laughing and giggling, oohing and aahing at every new wonder she encounters. It's this type of innocence that's fertile ground for fine writing. Wish you the best. Bill
    | Posted on 2005-12-15 00:00:00 | by rws | [ Reply to This ]
      why is it that people sometimes think the more words used the better? this is perfect. what's strange is that I just saw my little girl off to her moms house for awhile and she has been soooo on my mind, I hate letting her go, breaks my heart every time. then I stumble across your poetry (I just read "be still") and somehow I feel better. "Be Still" was a little frightening but it reminded me where my trust lies and this one just made me smile, kids. I don't know if the line "healer of broken bones" had anything to do with the saying "sticks and stones may break my bones" but thats what it made me think of, how the things that come out of the mouths of little ones are so innocent and not intended to be hurtful (usually anyhow) well I really enjoyed this, thank you for sharing...

    Milo
    | Posted on 2005-11-28 00:00:00 | by Milo shanley | [ Reply to This ]
      there is absolutely nothing in the world like the love of a mother for her child. you see this little being grow and mature, and change...you see the depths of her passions, and her knowledge grow. i can only imagine how beautiful this relationship is that you have with her, but you gave us a glimpse with this lovely tribute. wow!
    | Posted on 2005-09-19 00:00:00 | by stolie77 | [ Reply to This ]
      My princess I never had yet have all along... She's preciously placed. You've captured her down to the last curly lock. Precious words portrayed in perfect poetry! Again!
    | Posted on 2005-09-09 00:00:00 | by Aphrodite Dream | [ Reply to This ]
      That's sweet... I have a little red haired niece, big brown eyes, the curliest hair, gorgeous... Children can be cute, I guess. For short periods of time... This was a really well written work though, so peace. -rue
    | Posted on 2005-09-03 00:00:00 | by Rue | [ Reply to This ]
      Beautiful, just beautiful!! I am picturing her in my head right now! She's adorable!

    That was a really sweet poem and so emotional and sincere of course!

    Like Celine Dion said "There is no love like the mother's love to her child"!! I think she's totally right!

    Well done and keep it up.
    | Posted on 2005-09-03 00:00:00 | by Beast | [ Reply to This ]
      A very wonderful collection of snapshots. Having raised a daughter of my own I appreciate every word that you've written. There's nothing quite like a little girls giggle to put a smile on your heart. Thank you so much for a great write.
    Bill
    | Posted on 2005-09-03 00:00:00 | by rankamateur | [ Reply to This ]
      The simplicity and barreness of your style is what makes it remarkable. The lines "love of my life and ...my indigo child" really seem to bookend the more straightforward descriptive lines throughout. The line "giggler of note" creates a sort of respite in the center as well.

    I don't rightfully know what it is i'm trying to say here, except that as usual this little poem is a gem.

    The poems that people write for their kids are among the best that i've read on elite. Always so honest and heartfelt and true...this poem among them.
    thanks for sharing
    see you later, kc
    | Posted on 2005-09-03 00:00:00 | by twacky | [ Reply to This ]
      I like this piece because of it's lack of "proper" flow. It seems to be more like a litany of titles than a tirbute...more of a this is who you are...
    that within it'self is unique... that is usually only done in the Bible..
    I wrote a piece talking about a beloved child awhile ago, it's called Almost... you should check it out.

    Acknowledge the Power Within
    Oracle
    | Posted on 2005-09-03 00:00:00 | by Oracle | [ Reply to This ]


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