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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Alaska Raindots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: snufthepunk28
    ASL Info:    21/f/ak
    Elite Ratio:    4.5 - 244/178/68
    Words: 262
    Class/Type: Story/Love
    Total Views: 747
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1472



    Description:
       yesterday. some friends and i went to a place called protage glasher. we got the car stuck real good. tire of the ground and all. yet it wasnt a big deal to me.
    the storm we where cought in was... amazing.
    this the discription didnt come out as clean cut as i would have liked. later perhaps i will re-write it.
    snuff


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsAlaska Raindots
    -------------------------------------------


    Your clothing and hair is soaking wet in minutes.
    Standing in the rain and closing your eyes feeling the drops roll down your face and past your lips.
    So instance you could escape back to the lost memories of home where the sun kissed your face red.
    Open your eyes to find yourself still standing in what would seem to be the eye of the tornado. Even though you can feel the rain pour down you can see it moving across the surface of the sky like the waves.
    Rain drops in the wind miring the movement of the ocean tide.
    Like the golden grain fields back home casting shadow like waves from the blowing winds.
    Both bring with it an end.
    Forty two waterfalls on a single mountain side.
    The glacier was almost hidden by the clouds lowering from the sky.
    A sillouette of the mountains across the ocean still exist.
    You’re praising God who controls all of this.
    Such beauty mixed with such force of power, you scarily take your eyes away because you simple don’t want to miss a moment.
    The God who controls this…(sigh)
    The God who made it…
    The God whose hands cradle all of this!...
    Cares even about the husband you want in you life, and the price of gas that you need to buy.
    Then the real wonder and amazement set in. that you can relax. The big as well as the little things, Gods going to handle it.
    Simple watch the enjoy the beauty of it.




    Submitted on 2005-09-05 19:16:30     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      well where is portage glasher i mean the place

    your poem its a okk one
    | Posted on 2007-05-08 00:00:00 | by SAMEER | [ Reply to This ]
      Then the real wonder and amazement set in. that you can relax. The big as well as the little things, Gods going to handle it.
    Simple watch the enjoy the beauty of it.

    This is a nice way to tie up the piece. Very nice.

    Suggestions:

    Maybe look at the way you are using words.

    Standing in the rain and closing your eyes feeling the drops roll down your face and past your lips.

    Standing in the rain and closing your eyes feeling the drops roll down your face past lips.

    I think you might be able to reduce the number of words and actually make the message clearer.

    No need to change it, just thoughts from another perspective.

    I enjoyed this one.

    Chrystine
    | Posted on 2005-10-23 00:00:00 | by beatthedrum | [ Reply to This ]
      i don't really think this is classed as a story. but i like it veyr much none the less. your descriptive is very effective in stirring up visions of such natural things. you expressed your awe of your surroundings very well indeed. i am impressed and had to say something. well done! bye bye now, from angela :)
    | Posted on 2005-09-09 00:00:00 | by m with two i_s | [ Reply to This ]


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    73263

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    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.


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