Description: A piece writen to inspire us to open our selves to the authentic emotion of love....For with real love we love without conditions, hence the emotion that manifests from that is pure!!!
They will listen -------------------------------------------
Open the walls of your hearts
As I penetrate
The fibres of your beings
With this fire
I wont speak in toungues
You will not be confussed
The message is clearly conversed
Allow me to infiltrate
The core of your essence
Let me cleanse you
Errect a home
within your soul
Don't be adamant
To welcome me
I am genuine
My motive is pure
For nothing can resist love
Nothing can overcome
A feeling so remarkable
This was a great love poem Pumi! You really did a great job of giving life and character to love. I hope that you get what I'm saying. I think I may be confusing myself! lol
Allow me to infiltrate The core of your essence Let me cleanse you Errect a home within your soul
This was by far my most favorite stanza in this piece. This was a very beautiful write! I absolutely loved how you worded this piece! Candi
There is literally no exact words for an adequate translation of love. Love is ultimately spoken through emotions and its wonderful that one could speak so boldly about a loved one. Its wonderful work here. lets start with a frivolous analysis (sorry but a critique is always hearltess):
Open the walls of your hearts * As I penetrate The fibres of your beings With this fire
(directly adressing the ambiguous reader, no gender especifically) A nice way to have a bold connection with the reader.
I wont speak in toungues You will not be confussed The message is clearly conversed
Allow me to infiltrate The core of your essence Let me cleanse you Errect a home within your soul
These two stanza in particular are well Written such as Infilttrating into someone's essence as well as cleansing them sounds as a pure and emotional pathos that's catchy and at the same time adds colour to the metaphor.
Don't be adamant To welcome me I am genuine My motive is pure
For nothing can resist love Nothing can overcome A feeling so remarkable
In the two stanzas here, you welcome your love or the narrator, presenting itself to be genuine and pure which is good to imbue these since your description correlates well,m genuine and pure are good dicto's for a love poem. And as for regarding love with remarkability, its essential with the tie of the previous words, (never want any loose ties). As it end with "do not turn," the reader wants to feel likewise, the persuasive context stimulates the general audience to feel sympathy for you, and thus giving a good touch, a clear and decisive carpe diem! :-)
The diction choice is good as I knoe dear freind that your writing is always good. keep them coming, keep that natural style that your inclined to write in your delightful poems Sincerely Alexis
Ahhh...! Another love poem written very well and spoken so truthful! It is nice to read about a love that is pure and unconditional! So many who think they know what love is or think they are in love try to mold and change the person into what they want them to be instead of accepting them for what they are and loving them for the individual they are. That is not real love to me. You have captured the essence of what real love is all about and this is very nicely stated! Nice poem Pumi! Take care!
“Open the walls of your hearts As I penetrate The fibres of your beings With this fire”
Man, what a great start and well written poem! If love spoke to me in this way, I would constantly be in it!
“Allow me to infiltrate The core of your essence Let me cleanse you Errect a home within your soul”
You know, you have a way with words, like I don’t see very often. “Love” is so frequently used as a topic, but the way you gave life to this emotion was done exceptionally well.
Submission Name: They will listen
