Full Circle by Angel_of

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Submission Name: Full Circle dots

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Author:	Angel_of_Hate
ASL Info:	18/Male/New Mexico
Elite Ratio:	2.8 - 11/18/12
Words:	99

Class/Type:	Poetry/Dark
Total Views:	317
Average Vote:	No vote yet.
Bytes:	524

Description:
Take what you will from it.

Full Circle dots

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I am drenched with the blood of the blind
I gag on their sins
They tear at my immortal soul
Leaving my human vessel ravaged

I am drowning in a sea of hate
Everytime I gasp for sanity I'm driven back down
Longing for a way out that will never come
Wanting help, but never daring to ask

The blood that has been splattered on me absorbs into my being
It floods my psyche
The sins now my own
The hate now for the blind

Submitted on 2005-09-14 21:58:34 Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

1: >_<
2: I dunno...
3: meh!
4: Pretty cool
5: Wow!

||| Comments |||
  Upon deeper inspection it has some depth, but I'm sorry, I have to be honest, it didn't strike me as all that original. I think you put things a little to bluntly. Dark poetry has it's clichés, and they are blood, sin, hatred and despair, but the trick is to use these while concealing the cliché with clever, original wording and creative insight, that which I didn't see much of here. I'm tired of reading about " Drowning in a sea of hate" " tearing at my immortal soul" and such. Go ahead and write about hate and sin, but without actually using those words. Now there's a challenge!
| Posted on 2005-09-26 00:00:00 | by Jeniffer | [ Reply to This ]
  Other peoples hate is overwhelming you by the sound of your poem. Don't let them do that to you! Hold your own court. Be your own person and stand up for what you believe in! Don't listen to their hate and don't let them splash their evil 'blood' on you...wipe it off, and keep on keepin' on. Your opinion matters as much as theirs does, maybe more. You sound like a good and loving person who others are hurting with their blind hate and persecution of others, and I really hope that you will learn not to listen to it, its everywhere in this world, I know, and you have to just tune them out. Good write and its an example for all of us to learn to be proud of our own opinions and beliefs, and the others can all go to hell if they can't respect that right that is yours. Take care, cher
| Posted on 2005-09-14 00:00:00 | by Inducted_Kitty | [ Reply to This ]
  i loved this...this is probably kinda scary too but i connected with it... a hatred for humanity, all the fools surrounding us as we wade through them like feces to a busted water main...(hmm...maybe i'll use that one...) we are forced to listen to their sorrows only to absorb them and then we hate them for it because its just useless crap to us, nothing to be gained by it, nothing to be used by it, just useless...i liked it...perhaps i'll put it on favorites.
-drizzt
| Posted on 2005-09-14 00:00:00 | by Drizzt | [ Reply to This ]

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