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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: (add on to) bitch now you deaddots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: maninthemirror
    ASL Info:    17/m/arkansas
    Elite Ratio:    2.64 - 224/318/109
    Words: 72
    Class/Type: Lyrics/Serious
    Total Views: 502
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 431



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dots(add on to) bitch now you deaddots
    -------------------------------------------


    there ain't shit that you can tell me I don't already know/
    but see, the man in the mirror got plenty to show/
    and I'll yell it from the mountains so everybody will hear/
    your driving down the road, and whos that in your mirror/
    it's me.. your throat is slit, bitch now you dead/
    and seventeen be on your head/
    it's all good though/
    you had to go/




    Submitted on 2005-09-15 16:18:43     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      lol! i agree this was funny tho it isnt supposed to be...i thought it was kind of short...but kool! i havent read some of your stuff in a looooong aSs time! this was a good start!

    XxXSuicidalxxChildXxX
    | Posted on 2005-09-20 00:00:00 | by Suicidalchild51 | [ Reply to This ]
      i liked this one. it was funny 2 me even though i know it wasn't meant 2 be. it wasn't brilliant but it still hit me. it was raw emotion. now i know why amber likes ur writing so much. she writes stuff like this sometimes too. i think i read the first one a while back. what made u add this after so long?
    | Posted on 2005-09-19 00:00:00 | by unknown soldier | [ Reply to This ]
      Sounds like a rap to me, so i feel maybe you were trying to come across to a reader who understands that kind of talk, i wouldn't call it brilliant, but i'm sure that wasn't your intention to start with.
    | Posted on 2005-09-15 00:00:00 | by Martin S. Allen | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

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    7. What was unclear?
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    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



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