In your eyes I saw the blue heaven
So clearly for the first time.
If only I could lie in your arms forever
I think for the first time
In a long time
I would sleep without fear.
The wind so red blew in upon
The cloud called dust,
And the sky was a sea of gold.
For the first time in a long time
Your eyes were alive.
And truly I knew what it meant to be born.
So alive after such a quite,
Hearing the pulse beat
After such a long still
No longer denied the title given
To those who are born,
Because for the first time in a long time
You are really alive.
Finally, my baby, they have labeled you human.
wow. i thought that was great. i definetly agree with graeme, it could be interpretted so many ways. it made me feel good, like sort of, filled me with hope. sorry my comments not very good, i just never know what to say. keep up0 the good work :) - angela
Well, this is really interesting, although I'm not sure if I get your meaning or not, it can have a lot of interpretations... I like the way you structured it, although with all the colour references, I'd like to see one near the finish to keep the color theme going.
"quite" seems to be a typo for quiet, which I feel could be said in a better way, maybe "so alive after such a long paralysis" or something like that. The contradiction of "quiet" to "alive" isn't quite there.
Very very thought-provoking, I'm still trying to figure it out, so in that respect it's excellent.