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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Deathdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: poet09
    Elite Ratio:    3.8 - 157/162/122
    Words: 66
    Class/Type: Poetry/Depressed
    Total Views: 1408
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 358



    Description:
       Just keep it real with me about this poem


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsDeathdots
    -------------------------------------------


    Death is a cry that people can carry on for the rest of their lives

    Death is a shadow that has come over everything light

    Death is what is at the end of life with no turning back

    Death is what can come like a theif swift and quick without a trace

    Death is the final solution to all things that live




    Submitted on 2005-09-19 06:46:27     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      I think the first line is the best, I like how you take something so seemingly finite as death and give it immortality through the cries of other people. I thought that was clever. Opening with a paradox is very intriguing to the reader.

    | Posted on 2015-01-03 00:00:00 | by lori_tab | [ Reply to This ]
      One can be obsessed with death.Death is'ntwhat it always seems though.It could be a parting internally of an indiviual.I don't dislike or have a problem with howyou put at all bc we all eventually go and we all definitely look at death differentltfromone another.So I don'tthink this is referringto departing the earth and dying physically.I believe when you say deathyou talking about feelings inside of you dying and youwishing they'd go away.Another reason why this poem is in the category ofdepression.So that's what I believe your talking about here.But as a writer you have displayed the ability make it officially stated as the finaloutcome of life more than somethingdark and hideous.So I won't say I don'tlike but it is what it is. Peace and Inspiration

    RG
    | Posted on 2010-09-04 00:00:00 | by Rex Gold | [ Reply to This ]
      Yes. Death IS the solution to all things that live. Kill them all!!! F**KING SLAUGHTER THEM. If they deserve to live they'll join up with you and rise and kill until nothing's left.
    | Posted on 2009-01-14 00:00:00 | by Old | [ Reply to This ]
      you have a real good sense of words you would probably do better by trying to write a book if you totaly feel poetry instead the only advice i would give you is to show some personal feelings
    | Posted on 2005-09-20 00:00:00 | by Ronswords | [ Reply to This ]
      Way too short this could have been a spectacular poem if you just put more words into your feelings do not be afraid to put some happy thoughts with the sad it can totaly make a poem
    | Posted on 2005-09-19 00:00:00 | by Ronswords | [ Reply to This ]
      Life- no one gets out alive. I liked this poem. The uncomfortable truth, none of us really admit too. We're good at pretending. Just gotta live while your alive, I suppose. SKY DIVING!
    | Posted on 2005-09-19 00:00:00 | by Red_reaper | [ Reply to This ]


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