[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav

  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav

    << | >>

    dots Submission Name: Deathdots

    Author: poet09
    Elite Ratio:    3.8 - 157/162/122
    Words: 66
    Class/Type: Poetry/Depressed
    Total Views: 1395
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 358

       Just keep it real with me about this poem

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.


    Death is a cry that people can carry on for the rest of their lives

    Death is a shadow that has come over everything light

    Death is what is at the end of life with no turning back

    Death is what can come like a theif swift and quick without a trace

    Death is the final solution to all things that live

    Submitted on 2005-09-19 06:46:27     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      I think the first line is the best, I like how you take something so seemingly finite as death and give it immortality through the cries of other people. I thought that was clever. Opening with a paradox is very intriguing to the reader.

    | Posted on 2015-01-03 00:00:00 | by lori_tab | [ Reply to This ]
      One can be obsessed with death.Death is'ntwhat it always seems though.It could be a parting internally of an indiviual.I don't dislike or have a problem with howyou put at all bc we all eventually go and we all definitely look at death differentltfromone another.So I don'tthink this is referringto departing the earth and dying physically.I believe when you say deathyou talking about feelings inside of you dying and youwishing they'd go away.Another reason why this poem is in the category ofdepression.So that's what I believe your talking about here.But as a writer you have displayed the ability make it officially stated as the finaloutcome of life more than somethingdark and hideous.So I won't say I don'tlike but it is what it is. Peace and Inspiration

    | Posted on 2010-09-04 00:00:00 | by Rex Gold | [ Reply to This ]
      Yes. Death IS the solution to all things that live. Kill them all!!! F**KING SLAUGHTER THEM. If they deserve to live they'll join up with you and rise and kill until nothing's left.
    | Posted on 2009-01-14 00:00:00 | by Old | [ Reply to This ]
      you have a real good sense of words you would probably do better by trying to write a book if you totaly feel poetry instead the only advice i would give you is to show some personal feelings
    | Posted on 2005-09-20 00:00:00 | by Ronswords | [ Reply to This ]
      Way too short this could have been a spectacular poem if you just put more words into your feelings do not be afraid to put some happy thoughts with the sad it can totaly make a poem
    | Posted on 2005-09-19 00:00:00 | by Ronswords | [ Reply to This ]
      Life- no one gets out alive. I liked this poem. The uncomfortable truth, none of us really admit too. We're good at pretending. Just gotta live while your alive, I suppose. SKY DIVING!
    | Posted on 2005-09-19 00:00:00 | by Red_reaper | [ Reply to This ]

    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?


    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    (Untitled Song) written by TeslaKoyal
    Keep written by TheStillSilence
    Beauty Rest written by jackz
    Twin Intercept written by Daniel Barlow
    no sky on the other side written by teika5
    Coversheets written by TheStillSilence
    Lie back & tan written by Daniel Barlow
    Ciggarettes written by Poetic_tragedy6
    FamiliarDemons ©™ written by kyserin
    Dream written by closetpoet
    Hyle written by endlessgame23
    Mystery Read written by kyserin
    When Sirens Whisper written by HisNameIsNoMore
    The World written by jjd
    A Thousand Reflections written by endlessgame23
    // Seasonal Song written by ShadowParadox
    Night- time written by Daniel Barlow
    Honeymoon written by TheStillSilence
    untitled written by Outlaw
    Loop-di-Loop written by endlessgame23
    Day 6 written by TheStillSilence
    In a Corner written by jeniecel
    Live In Between written by teika5
    Sword in the Water written by Wolfwatching
    Compartments written by TheStillSilence
    Things They (Don't) Say written by TheStillSilence
    A Worsening Effect written by Daniel Barlow
    None the Wiser written by endlessgame23
    Starseed written by endlessgame23
    To the Artist written by HisNameIsNoMore




    User Name:


    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]

    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]

    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]