Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: did that make him a rose?dots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Sarah Leger
    ASL Info:    15.f.kissimmee,Fl
    Elite Ratio:    3.74 - 436/387/80
    Words: 112
    Class/Type: Poetry/Serious
    Total Views: 969
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 834



    Description:
       um it's a religious piece if you can see it despite my Paganism...


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsdid that make him a rose?dots
    -------------------------------------------


    Whirling
    Whirling
    The sky is twirling
    Vomit it up
    only to swallow it down
    jagged pill
    rotting in the pit of her stomach
    People crying
    -because the angels are dying-
    hide from mercy
    feed the hungry
    and they'll only be thirsty
    SPEAKING FASTER
    repeating yourself
    the magic is gone
    your heart says so long
    Crowned by the vines
    did that make him a rose?
    chained to the wall of your Hell
    hidden by the dark
    -scream-
    -cry-
    -ignored-
    whipped by the Demons
    HIDE FROM THEIR MERCY!
    HIDE IN YOUR PAIN!
    Nailed down
    Rusty wounds
    standing high
    Because you were torn down
    and whisper

    so she doesn't feel your pain




    Submitted on 2005-09-19 16:18:27     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      True that. Yes its angry and sarcastic and still amazing. And I must admit each time I've read your work I haven't liked it... Til now that is. And I like the way it was set out, it reall suited this sort of poem. It feels like it's made up of two parts, the beginning feels separate from the end but the transition between is smooth and unnoticeable.
    Good work
    Laura-Grace
    | Posted on 2005-09-26 00:00:00 | by dark-red-pain | [ Reply to This ]
      Jesus Cahurist. Gohosh. lol. i hart this. It seems angry. Yet meaningful...well...yes meaningful. lol. Not much to say. But umm i harted it hardkore. With a Q.

    Fukk Love from Within
    | Posted on 2005-09-19 00:00:00 | by Thinkingofyou | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    74894

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.


    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry