I know that the things in life that I want are really common...that I am not the only one in life that is hurt and needs a home and needs love and misses a certain sibling...but the fact that these are common pains won't alleviate how bad it hurts...it can't.
The only things that do ease my pain...even for small bits of time are the drugs that I allow myself to take and the bit of hope that things will ultimately get better. I don't want you to think that I am a druggie, I am not...with all the drugs that pass me by, all the pills that I get offered I really don't do anything...only when I get to the point that I know that nothing will calm me down except maybe a valium...or even half you know? I have seen to many people die in their addictions to be able to stomache much, but when I need it and the occasional weakness on my part I give in.
But again this is not the end of my story...until then I have to go for a bit.Enjoy.
yeah . . . i think you've figured out how to grab people by the jugular. your writing is developing into something pretty darn cool - not that it wasn't really good before. but you are taking it into another level and creating your own technique and style type thing in expressing yourself. that can only lead to good things and exciting areas. yeah . . . . goddamn. hey feel free to write me if u need to talk or anything. sorry, i've been busy so i haven't been able to really sit down and do e-mails. i suck at staying in touch.
Chin up dear friend, there are always healthier release. I too have been lost in dispair for years (have the same condition Cobain had) I fought a war I opposed, lost a fiance... and realized that life is beautiful. just keep looking. As a matter of fact, while in Iraq I found an amazing girl on this site. WE'd talk about what was going on in our lives, and we got close. Now we are in love, and we are support for the other. just try to have faith in people rather than pharmacuiticals. life is a long fight, but it's worth fighting.
well done been away for awhile this looks like you are finding out or going through some personal and tough issues Dont be to had on yourself if your words are tue seems to me your doing the right thing keep your mind on writing and that may help when you feel down sandman