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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Hidden Currentsdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: WandWielder
    ASL Info:    21-f-maryland
    Elite Ratio:    4.42 - 55/62/16
    Words: 65
    Class/Type: Poetry/Misc
    Total Views: 600
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 392



    Description:
       This is just something I threw together, then I was frustrated at always holding my tongue and seeing people I care for doing the same. There are so many people out there that hide what they feel or think because they fear other people, or other peoples opinions. And this is just a jot to kind of recognize them.


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    dotsHidden Currentsdots
    -------------------------------------------


    There is a world,
    Outside of what we see,
    An underlying current,
    Just out side of reach.

    A place of raw emotion,
    Urging to be released,
    Passions to run wild,
    Anger to fly free.

    Its hidden behind a void,
    Of everyday monotony,
    A screen of piece and happiness,
    A flowing riverís tranquility.




    Submitted on 2005-09-21 18:15:48     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      I like the message that you are tryng to send out from this poem. I think it sort of just ends aburptly and you could do so much more with it. I like the imagery used.
    " There is a world,
    Outside of what we see,
    An underlying current,
    Just out side of reach. "
    That was really good way to start it. I don't know. I like this and the message but it's kind of short ( which isn't bad) and you could have made it longer and got your point across a little bit better. overall I liked it. This was good. Nice use of emotion.
    | Posted on 2005-10-09 00:00:00 | by rent_a_fairy | [ Reply to This ]
      nothing special about this poem, but the message, none the less, is more than important. kinda short- although i like the way you use a mixture of abstract phrases to describe emotion. and thats all i have to say.

    liz
    | Posted on 2005-09-22 00:00:00 | by blndeliz | [ Reply to This ]


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    January 10 07
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