[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav

  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav

    << | >>

    dots Submission Name: I Want to Go Homedots

    Author: Elissar
    ASL Info:    22, Female, Minnesota
    Elite Ratio:    3.9 - 32/28/14
    Words: 87
    Class/Type: Poetry/Nature
    Total Views: 840
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 608

       I wrote this poem one day during school when I really wanted to go home during the day.

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsI Want to Go Homedots

    I want to go home.
    Through the forest,
    over the river,
    around the bend.

    I want to go home.
    Walking on brown crunchy leaves,
    Following the path,
    I'm almost there.

    I want to go home.
    Trees sway above,
    My mind flooded with memory,
    child, teen, adult.

    I want to go home.
    Its just up ahead,
    A little thatched cottage,
    A small garden shed.

    I want to go home.
    I'm there, I'm finally there,
    Home is where the heart is.
    My heart is here.

    Submitted on 2005-09-23 08:19:20     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      hey u!!! i like this!! ya schools out for me!! its kinda bittersweet cuz i hav 2 go 2 summer school and do all this work! and so its like im still in school! just not in da building but anyway there was so many days where im just like "is school over yet" good joB!
    | Posted on 2006-05-27 00:00:00 | by iluvpoetry_1 | [ Reply to This ]
      Really good write. Home is indeed where the heart lies - wherever that may be. Be mindful of punctuation i (brown) (thatched). I enjoyed reading this it was very good.
    | Posted on 2005-09-23 00:00:00 | by Frank Maguire | [ Reply to This ]
      Well this was interesting. I must say that much. It had the wanting and the central need that the person in the poem had. And you expressed this quite well I must say. I do although agree with Poetofuastralia. It seems somewhat like a nursery ryhme. But don't take the wrong way. It was great. A truely good read.

    Fukk Love from Within
    | Posted on 2005-09-23 00:00:00 | by Thinkingofyou | [ Reply to This ]
      hi! i have never read your poem before--it is the first time. it is a gud one and somewhat like a nursery rhyme which can actually be used in nursery school or play school curriculum so take it as a complement and not as a sarcastic remark and keep up the good work.
    | Posted on 2005-09-23 00:00:00 | by poetofaustralia | [ Reply to This ]
      I picked this poem of yours to read because i love nature poetry. and i'm very glad i did. Very good job. i liked the "brown crunchy leaves " line, lol.

    GBY! :)
    | Posted on 2006-08-14 00:00:00 | by MMISS | [ Reply to This ]

    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?


    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.




    User Name:


    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]

    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]

    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]