I like the words that you used, the flow of it could probably use some work, also your rhyming scheme...you rhyme a bit then you free flow it is a very wacky pattern. Other than that I enjoyed it.
this is dark and i have liked it especially because you talk about the person giving the same responces everyday, it adds a touch of reality. the relationship part, well i know what it feels like so i will not comment on that. as for the ending, its great, the final nail aimed perfect and true. great stuff
hmmm its very...independant...you wanna show people you are okay so they will leave you be...but on the inside...your thinking about your "one and only"...ya...if im wrong tell me...but im putting it in my faves...and giving you a 5
This was pretty good. I couldn't tell if you wanted it to rhyme or not.other than that it was sttong poem. the ending was great i thought.hope to hear from you and keep up the good work.
well it was ok. I agree was full of emotion. Is this another form or style of format with out capitalization. Im sorry but not familiar with this one. Was there a reason there was no capitalization especially on I. Was it to pronounce the "I" more meaning the writer. I dont know what I m trying to say. Please excuse me.
It reminds me of a sad french art film I saw about the love between two people who always dared eachother to do things that were often cruel to ask of someone. Don't ask why it reminds me, it's complicated but it's a compliment. Keep it up.
A sad write - but very effective and full of emotion. Reflecting on a lost / past love is always tinged with sadness. You captured the theme of this very well & well done.
Submission Name: dont forget
