Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: cant help but love itdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: maninthemirror
    ASL Info:    17/m/arkansas
    Elite Ratio:    2.64 - 224/318/109
    Words: 185
    Class/Type: Lyrics/Misc
    Total Views: 439
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1118



    Description:
       Can you really not love this......cause I have to ....this is the shit....at least I THINK so


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotscant help but love itdots
    -------------------------------------------


    the reason i rap, well it's a complicated thing/
    like asking mr. manson whats the reason for his being/
    can you afford to love me and the shit that I stand for/
    if I didn't rap for money is it me, not you whod bore/
    bore me with all ur pitches of success/
    you wanna be a rapper, fuckin got off house arrest/
    then you come talk to me, and we'll work out something/
    and maybe who knows, you might be and aberrant king/
    untill then leave me the fuck alone/
    work on your lyrics and rap harder than bone/
    so that, when you spit your shit/
    you break the bones of every bitch/
    bust noses, black eyes with rhymes/
    make every word you say not late, but on time/
    run with a group, so when people fuck with you/
    you can laugh, cause they behind you like"what you gonna do"/
    what I'm trying to do is get inside your brain/
    make you realize my life is insane/
    don't fuck with this aberrant, juggalo king/
    unless you want impelled by an electric pole beam/




    Submitted on 2005-09-26 20:31:36     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      hmm...i liked it...but not LOVED it...it wasnt as good ass some of the shIt Youve posted. idk what it was tho.i think Joe R is a bItch tho..he dont kno what the fUck hes talkin about...he just hasnt seen your work..that makes mne mad...lil fUcker...he should read other stuff b4...

    **kisses and hugs**

    XxXsuicidalxxChildXxX
    | Posted on 2005-09-27 00:00:00 | by Suicidalchild51 | [ Reply to This ]
      Honestly, I thought this was whack. The lyrics were just whack, there's nothing else to say. You need to work on your rhyme and rhythm. I don't mean to completely diss your rap but I wasn't feelin' it. If this is a battle rap then you need to work on your lines, so that they they'll make people go, "Damn, that was tight!"
    | Posted on 2005-09-27 00:00:00 | by FoxxyRoxxanne | [ Reply to This ]
      that guy called u mate. what the fvck? i have to admit. this one wasn't all that good. i've seen better from you. just keep writing and keep posting. don't let the haters knock ur hustle.
    | Posted on 2005-09-27 00:00:00 | by unknown soldier | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    75665

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    (Untitled Song) written by TeslaKoyal
    To the Artist written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Across the bed written by expiring_touch
    Suffer The Children written by poetotoe
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (3) written by endlessgame23
    The World written by jjd
    The Old Mill written by Wolfwatching
    Shi written by ShyOne
    Records I written by Raphael
    mimicry written by expiring_touch
    // Seasonal Song written by ShadowParadox
    Physician, Heal Thyself written by WriteSomething
    Vortex: The Imagination That Is written by KeeperOfLight
    Love written by saartha
    Reliquary of Writ written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Journey written by endlessgame23
    to Be like written by KeeperOfLight
    Relativity written by poetotoe
    Lilitu written by endlessgame23
    Lost Inside the Race written by ForgottenGraves
    winners circle written by ShyOne
    Deep Into A World Of Despair written by DeathTone
    Cover written by saartha
    The Unicorn written by BlazeFlamme
    Honeymoon written by TheStillSilence
    Shut Up written by annie0888
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth written by endlessgame23
    prison written by ShyOne
    phantom limbs written by expiring_touch
    Coversheets written by TheStillSilence

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry