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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: HOT RAUNCHY SEX!!!dots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: BenCollier
    Elite Ratio:    3.72 - 425/386/88
    Words: 119
    Class/Type: Spoof/Comedy
    Total Views: 837
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 786



    Description:
        Sorry, for those of you pervs looking for a sex poem, that was only a hook to get you to read this one.

    This is Steve Irwin (The Crocodile Hunter) singing to the tune of "If I Only Had a Brain". You know, the scarecrow song from the Wizard Of Oz???

    Hope I didn't disappoint you too much. And I hope you like the parody.

    your friend
    Ben


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsHOT RAUNCHY SEX!!!dots
    -------------------------------------------


    I would gather all the ratings
    And suffer the berating
    While masturbating geese.
    And the censors would be scratching
    Their heads as I was hatching
    With another stupid show

    I would travel any river
    To make weak hearts a’quiver
    With another stupid show
    If my wife wasn’t a spurner
    I could be another Ted Turner
    With another stupid show

    Oh, when a cobra spits my eye
    I hope that I won’t die
    As I piss off another predator
    While I stick my thumb in a crocs ass

    I would not be just a nuffin’
    While huffin and puffin
    Running away from bees
    I would giggle like a fairy
    Playing with dingle-berries
    With another stupid show




    Submitted on 2005-10-03 05:03:36     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      yeah i fell for it.
    but im not disappointed.
    im far from it.
    ***steve irwin is missed***
    (tear, tear)
    | Posted on 2007-02-05 00:00:00 | by XmaryjaneX | [ Reply to This ]
      You really shouldn't make that the title, you know. I'm not a perv, God no, but I DID come here expecting to have to berate you about the horrors of posting inappropriate poetry. NOT SMART. I hope you're aware that there are poets here under the age of 14 who don't want to have to read your title, and ask their parents what it means. NOT SMART. For the sake of yourself, and other poets, kindly remove that title.
    | Posted on 2006-09-13 00:00:00 | by Aurora-Borealis | [ Reply to This ]
      First off- Thanking God she read the description.
    Okey.
    LOL!

    This was a great piece. I needed something like this to lighten the mood tonight. It was funny, I'm still giggling.


    BCute

    (As I told your wife you all are right to be proud of your boy. He's very mature for his age. I had to add his poem to my favs.)
    | Posted on 2006-08-24 00:00:00 | by BCute | [ Reply to This ]
      I should have read the descritption first, as Iam just another pervert.

    This was different! Not sure what make of it, perhaps there's noithing to make of it - Just a little fun with words. It held my interest though and I did enjoy it!

    If you want to read something REALLY RAUNCHY,
    you and Cleo should read the encounter. Very explicit! Not for the prude or weak of heart!!!

    Steve
    | Posted on 2005-12-16 00:00:00 | by SHRINKSDR | [ Reply to This ]
      !
    TGINAS! (thank God it's not about sex!)
    didn't like it...didn't like it...cuz it was still nasty..don't write about nasty crap...makes you look stupid...
    | Posted on 2005-11-05 00:00:00 | by Avril54 | [ Reply to This ]
      That is so not cool Dude. I thought it was going to be some hilarious poem about sex. And yes I know I'm a perv. :PGood write though, well done!

    B.
    | Posted on 2005-10-17 00:00:00 | by disposablesoul | [ Reply to This ]
      Dave, very cool piece of satire, great subject, and well written.
    I love a good parody, and you've done well with this, funny, funny, funny!

    be Happy

    Graeme
    | Posted on 2005-10-07 00:00:00 | by wewak11 | [ Reply to This ]
      "I don't have the faintest idea why, but I like this poem. Good imagery also with the finger buried in a gators ass etc.-cool-Mugsy-
    | Posted on 2005-10-04 00:00:00 | by mugsy | [ Reply to This ]
      I was suprised to find it wasn't about Hot Raunchy Sex (& a bit disappointed!) considering some of the others you've written...muwahahaha~~~
    Gotta give it 2 ya though on your marketing ploy!
    I have this action figure of the Croc Hunter I got as a gag gift one Christmas you press his back and he says, "Crikey, that's the biggest snake I've ever seen" and a few other sayings. He's a crazy nut! Crikey! Love,Peace,Joy! tif
    | Posted on 2005-10-03 00:00:00 | by Epiphany | [ Reply to This ]
      i agree with poet, the title was so controversal that most people saw it, looked behind them to make sure no one was watching (just in case), and clicked anticipating a "pleasurable read". the repitition is interesting, and overall i thought i was a pretty good write, keep it up
    | Posted on 2005-10-03 00:00:00 | by kma12790 | [ Reply to This ]
      LoL it's pretty interesting I have to admit...Pretty funny...good job dude...ya but I don't think you'll need that title..otherwise a lot of people could be missing out on e good stuff...cheers...
    | Posted on 2005-10-03 00:00:00 | by cOoL_DudE | [ Reply to This ]
      This poem was pretty good for the most part.
    The way you get people to come and read this poem by having the title deal with sex was a brillant idea.
    | Posted on 2005-10-03 00:00:00 | by poet09 | [ Reply to This ]


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