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    dots Submission Name: Brokendots

    Author: Geraldine
    ASL Info:    25
    Elite Ratio:    3.2 - 241/296/80
    Words: 36
    Class/Type: Poetry/Depressed
    Total Views: 923
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 352

       I've been hurt...yet again!

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.


    Crushed heart
    Lost soul
    Vacant eyes
    Black Hole

    Faded smile
    Tears cried
    Broken promises
    Words lied

    Shattered dreams
    Clouded thoughts
    Unheard prayers
    Redemption sought

    Lingering visions
    Memories lye
    Love surrenders
    Hope dies

    Submitted on 2005-10-03 16:01:09     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      It's as if you're inside of me, writing everything that's going on in my soul. This piece is awesome, it drives right into me and kinda splashes me with cold water...like 'Wake up idiot!' ya know? I really think I needed to read this, it shows that feeling of emptiness, it helps the reader understand exactly where you were coming from when you wrote it. It's almost as if everything got dark and I could see the tears and the sorrow through your words.

    Thanks for the excellent write.

    *bunches of hugs*

    | Posted on 2006-02-09 00:00:00 | by SouthrnQT | [ Reply to This ]
      with very few words you manage to express so many thoughts and emotions. it seems that hope is always dying because it is so easy to give in to the pain than to believe that something better may come of it. im sorry if im offf topic. i just thought htat this was a really great peice and i can totally relate. to it.so great job keep it up, and im sorry that you were hurt, i hope everything works out for the best for you. good luck...Joy
    | Posted on 2005-10-03 00:00:00 | by sweet_rayne | [ Reply to This ]
      Hmm...brilliant conveyance. You certainly do have a way with words. The rhyme in this poem catches and holds the attention and then gently transports the reader through the poem. Once again, a good write.
    | Posted on 2005-10-03 00:00:00 | by Dark_Dancer | [ Reply to This ]
      wowza I really liked this. All of it. I felt like this once. I really got back to what that felt like after reading it. Good choice of words...loved it.
    | Posted on 2005-10-03 00:00:00 | by _DeathBySofa_ | [ Reply to This ]
      Your few words speak volumes. That is quite an achievement in itself. What you managed to cram into 32 words was nothing short of exceptional. Well done for writing this and I hope all works out for you - keep your chin and spirits up.
    | Posted on 2005-10-03 00:00:00 | by Frank Maguire | [ Reply to This ]
      Aww, I'm sad to hear this happened to you. The poem is written very well and the imagry you use makes it much sadder. I am sorry that this has happened to you; though I cannot relate to it, I know you feel betrayed and alone. Don't worry, you are never alone.

    | Posted on 2005-10-03 00:00:00 | by WindEmpress | [ Reply to This ]

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