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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Passion for a Lover (Part 2)dots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: poet09
    Elite Ratio:    3.8 - 157/162/122
    Words: 205
    Class/Type: Poetry/Passion
    Total Views: 1115
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1246



    Description:
       Please tell me how this poem make you feel about the one you are with.
    Give me all the feedback that you think this poem needs or doesn't need.

    After all there are many people who could write such a freakish poem but all they need to do is just let their writing flow.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsPassion for a Lover (Part 2)dots
    -------------------------------------------


    The way that are bodies
    move in sycrnizing motion
    The way that you make
    me feel when I am around
    you

    The sound of our hearts
    thumping and beating by the
    pace we are going
    Moving faster than the
    pace that are bodies can't
    seem to keep up with

    Licking that gorgeous body
    from head to toe hoping
    not to miss one part of
    that silky carmel brown skin

    Your eyes meet mine and
    all we can do is go faster and
    harder until your juices are
    at a peak where they are
    flowing like running water

    Sexual feeling that I need
    you to fulfill never stopping to
    be still

    Me inside of you and having
    you in so many positions that
    you couldn't even imagine

    From the back or from the front
    how you like it is up to you
    Always remember I will never
    cease to give you what you want

    We will make love until the break of dawn

    Passionate lover now we have fallen in love what's there to do next?

    if you ever need some lovin' i am always here for you




    Submitted on 2005-10-11 06:30:13     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      ya umm im just a chick thinging ego trip at the end
    but if the girl had you good time the dude aloud to have a ego trip
    i like the whole thing all 3 very good
    you might work on rythem but ya im not really concintration on rythem while reading it mostly ummmm... ya other thing
    bye
    | Posted on 2005-10-30 00:00:00 | by bloodied_angel | [ Reply to This ]
      i dont like the last line but that not a problem! this was sweet! glad ur in love! u better stay in love! or ur gonna have problems!
    ~akaila evonne~
    | Posted on 2005-10-11 00:00:00 | by iluvpoetry_1 | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
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    9. How could it be improved?
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    12. Does it feel original?



    77202

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

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