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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: dispeldots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: disturbedx1000
    ASL Info:    21/m/ny
    Elite Ratio:    3.72 - 204/316/119
    Words: 64
    Class/Type: Poetry/Dark
    Total Views: 364
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 402



    Description:
       just wrote it so plz comment if you wish


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsdispeldots
    -------------------------------------------


    a violent outburst unable to be controlled,
    digression and anger flare from within,
    douse the sinister flames of my kin,
    the breaths I take have no life,
    my rage consumes my everlasting light,
    burning my eyes with fires of hell,
    this corruption of mine i try to dispel,
    failing at every attempt to over throw the
    now my rage consumes me




    Submitted on 2005-10-11 06:37:13     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      first before the poem i must apologize i havne't commented in a while so for a minute i may sound stupid
    nice icon deally
    now on to the poetry wow thats pretty good (sorry for the trite-ness) the last line is short and kinda leaves it hanging (in my head anyway) on the almost last line it just ends in the is it supposed to be that way?
    Pryncess
    | Posted on 2005-10-11 00:00:00 | by PryncessVynom | [ Reply to This ]
      i dont know what to say..this is indeed very good eventhough it is short...i really liked the way you have talked about your rage and the way it consumes you..well written...the best part is how each line complements each other to create a multilayered feeling...
    | Posted on 2005-10-11 00:00:00 | by jassal | [ Reply to This ]



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    January 10 07
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