Ignis Fatuus
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Description:
a little bit of F. Scott Fitzgerald and a little bit of Oscar Wilde, hopefully you can pick it out.
Ignis Fatuus
the room is filled sweet young girls scented flowers blooming in smoky chambers already learning how to manipulate men arm around a shoulder here, faux intoxication all the while knowing in the soberness of their minds they came here for something and they wont leave without it long thin arms encircling collared necks hair gleaming like the diamonds in their ears beer in green glass bottles lying crisp and golden inside like a fresh autumn apple in a child's hand merlot flowing freely slopping over glasses to stain drunken mouths filled with glee and chins nestled in shoulders the dance is crazy and frivolous happy and lighthearted but their lives are quietly dark and full of secrets like the lockets around their swan necks you look pretty in that dress he says thank you she replies with the blink of an eye a shadow of doubt not knowing whether to give in to the tensions of their bodies forced so obviously together in the crowd and the lights and the din pressed impossibly closer with each passing song the night is young but he can focus on what he wants like a keen laser beam tracking down its prey in the blackness while all the while she wonders why her life lies scattered in the wind like pages torn from an old book yin and yang live on in drug laced dreams existence their only absolute for tomorrow night's another party. |
Submitted on 2005-10-14 22:27:36 Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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You've pointed out what a mockery society can be for a genration of 'good' little girls who circle like vultures round the elders that should be their teachers but have become their predators. The setting reminds me of the 20's, a la Gatsby, but the sentiment is strictly Wilde (who would laugh at lecherous old fools being played by bright young things playing dumb). What irony! Nicely, nicely done. Take care. Bill.| | Posted on 2006-02-01 00:00:00 | by rws | [ Reply to This ] | I know Ignis means fire but I couldn't find the meaning of Fatuus... unless there is some sort of pun or something here that I can't catch... | okay enough rambling I get his impression of all of the girls in the room looking and dressing the the same. Like they weren't individuals but just girls to dance with for a night and then leave them for the next night's party. yet in the middle of all fo this there seemed a little more when the man in the crowd complicmented 'her' on her dress. It seemed like only these two of all of the dancers were different. I could be interpreting this completely wrong but this is how I see it and what I get out of it. I think the only lines that really bothered me were these: "like a keen laser beam tracking down its prey in the blackness" somehow it felt wrong in this particular place. Like the man who seemed different wasn't, just another dancer. Even if that wasn't your desired effect it still feels too dine and keen to be in this context. Everything else in this poem gives the feeling of a blur. hope this has helped (sorry I am not the best at interpreting poems) -mystmaker | Posted on 2005-10-27 00:00:00 | by MystMaker | [ Reply to This ] | I'm not a big F. Scott Fitzgerald fan, though I have read a little of the Great Gatsby but I am a huge Oscar Wilde fan. I noticed that you used latin for your title just like Wilde's work "De Profundis" (awesome work) and the hypocrisy that he used to joke about his culture, you have done with our culture. The intoxication of poison on both substance and relationships are mocked by simply presenting them bluntly to the public. I liked your style with this. The last line really surprised me. I was expecting a dark ending but it seems that you had fun with it. | The dialogue through me off a bit. That's my only major critique. I think the poem was strong enough to not need actual words spoken. The truth speaks for itself. Maybe that's the Fitzgerald in it. He tried to speak the truth about society and you did too. I hope I didn't mess up the meaning of your work and I hope I see it right. Please tell me if I'm way off in left field here! LOL Anyway, it's a fascinating piece of literature and I think Oscar Wilde would agree. Awesome job! | Posted on 2005-10-14 00:00:00 | by the_freaks_muse | [ Reply to This ] | |
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