Description: I just wrote this right into the submit thing because I can't sleep. It's a rough draft of sorts.
Forgotten or Foresaken -------------------------------------------
I look into your eyes
And see the tears come to a brim
The soft brown imprints clouded
With the juice of your heart
For a moment pity surges through my flesh
Just as I remember,
I've seen it all before.
You pout as your eyes grow
puffy and red
But I remember this time
And look to the moon
You try to hypnotize with your words
But the Raven says "Nevermore."
You try to manipulate
You draconion slob
I will not be pinioned by you any longer
They say men abuse
and force women to smile
But the true evil lies
In that seductive female grin
You try to confuse me
Make me forget what I knew
But no more
This is a cutting wisdom very few adults possess even as they claim to be mature. The fact that soulless tears almost suck you into a world of pity shows how easily the heart can be manipulated; but your declaration of independence at the close of the poem gives me hope you've learned a valuable lesson at an early age. Very nicely done.
Wow! Your poem "Forgotten or Forsaken,"was really your outlet during that moment when you can`t sleep, I can feel it. Ultimately, you end up with the words "I`m through," I`m very sorry that "it" ended in that way. I like poems that I inspired by certain emotions because they depicts authentic art. I am a new member of elite skills and I`m learning a lot from you guys.
Wow! For such a young age you have a very mature mind. This poem was excellent! Espesaily for it being written on the spot. I like how you showed the minipulative ways of the female race. Yes I am a female and you would think that I would be in favor of my own kind, and I am, but I do agree that the guys can be decived just as much by the girl as the other way around. Girls have a way of getting into guys heads and making them feel guilty for things they didn't even do. We tend to have you guys running around in circles untill you throw up. I, Myself, try not do that but I know my manipulative ways slip out once in awhile.
I love the way you wrote this and I espesaily like the last few lines:
"You try to confuse me Make me forget what I knew But no more I'm done It's over I'm through"