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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Doomed.dots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Kwanying
    ASL Info:    22/F/Denmark
    Elite Ratio:    2.1 - 23/29/13
    Words: 48
    Class/Type: Story/Death
    Total Views: 253
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 345



    Description:
       What are you looking for in terms of feedback? Any background information behind the piece? Hints? Is this just to vent? Emotional state while writing?


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsDoomed.dots
    -------------------------------------------


    A shadow walks,
    with silence in heart.
    Gently over the ground,
    like sand in a desert.
    Not a sound is heard,
    just the unspoken word.

    Which before contained life,
    now only has death.
    This shadow walks,
    without any hope.
    What ones where free,
    now is lost.




    Submitted on 2005-10-22 13:13:04     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    Rate This Submission

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    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      this is one that i think could be longer! but i could still feel the emotion of someone who is searching for something but cannot find what that is!good job!
    ~akaila~
    | Posted on 2006-07-15 00:00:00 | by iluvpoetry_1 | [ Reply to This ]
      it was good i thought maybe could have wrote a bit more because i was getting stuck into it! it could rhymed a bit more and maybe went in to it a little bit deeper!
    | Posted on 2005-10-23 00:00:00 | by scented | [ Reply to This ]
      This is okay to me, honestly! I really think you have much more to offer as a writer than what you are giving to us at this point. Continue drawing more and more ideas out of your mind, soul and spirit.
    | Posted on 2005-10-22 00:00:00 | by Martin S. Allen | [ Reply to This ]
      This kind of reminds me of the way i walk around from day to day. Not sure that it really rhymes though. But i don't think it really has to, to understand what your trying to say.
    | Posted on 2005-10-22 00:00:00 | by Stinkywizlteats | [ Reply to This ]



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    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
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