Description: For friends that love unconditionally!
Thank You, My Friend -------------------------------------------
In my head, I can see your eyes
Hear your voice and see your smile
Knowing in my heart, you would be
With me for quiet a while
I may never get to see you again
And your love, I may never win
But you will go with me everywhere
Like a treasure I was made to feel
Treating me so precious and tender
This will always and forever be remembered
Opening my eyes and letting me see
How true friendship was suppose to be
A short time only we were allowed to have
To spend together, just a little while
Memory of that time will stay in my heart
Even though miles have kept us apart
A friend to you, I hope to always be
For you will never know what you did for me
Thank you, my friend for being there
And really showing me that you care
Well if you wrote this to me I would get All warm and tingly and think you were Being awfully sweet
But you did not ask for thoughts you have Asked for an overall assessment, Which I guess Could include thoughts so I think this is very Sweet and as far as sending it to a friend Its perfect to express just how you feel It is lyrical easy to understand and I should Think anyone would be touched to receive Such a poem.
Now the rest of what I say is just me trying to Access it from the stand point of what little I Know and since I have not managed to Get published (I do have some nice rejection letters Saying to please keep trying) take it for what its worth.
Well It reminds me of popular country music Now I like country music so I donít consider That a bad thing, but I am not aware of any Publishers that are looking for this type of work. I understand that Nashville has more song Writers than they know what to do with.
So from one perspective it is fairly ordinary And could use some metaphoric comparisons To living it up.
Then you have a few lines that read a little Awkward these three in particular caught my Eye as be awkwardly structured
A short time only we were allowed to have To spend together, just a little while
A friend to you, I hope to always be
So what you might try doing is to Write out the idea of your poem In prose donít think about rhyme Or rhythm, think about how you Feel and what you want to say, Try and make your point by comparing Your feelings to something else Instead of saying
In my head, I can see your eyes Hear your voice and see your smile Knowing in my heart, you would be With me for quiet a while
Try to think of something that the two of you Did together a fun day or intimate moment That made you realize how much this person Means to you, now its imposable for me To know what that might be
But lets just say you spent the day Riding horses in the country first you Could write it out like in a journal or Diary trying to remember everything You can and get it down on paper Then try to think of something that Sums this experience up
Together we rode the thunder Through the valley of laughing eyes With the music of the wild wind Your heart sang to mine.
So thatís what I suggest in this case Take each important part of the Day you spent or maybe pick the Highlights from several different Days then try and make a metaphoric Comparison to explain how it made You feel and forget all about trying To make it rhyme. Dale
Three words really stand out in this poem for me ...I mean just reached out there and grabbed me! "Always and forever" To make a long story short, these are the words I've put on every card and every gift I ever gave my wife doris Jean... This was really nice! !doc`
This is once again a poem by you that truefully touched my heart You have a way of bringing out emotion thats been stored up for awhile I really really enjoyed this poem I can easily see this inside a card we right to long lost friends
The heartfelt warmth and appreciation for a friend even though parted by space is so evident in your writing that it brings longing into my mind for those that I myself am parted from. Getting lost in your words almost allows for the random rhyming.
To have someone touch you in such a way as indicated in this poem, is a beautiful gift. An emotional bond of two people that, no matter how brief, touched each others lives in an unforgettable way. Another great write from you. I enjoyed! ~Sandra
This is a wonderful poem! So very heartfelt and sincere! This is indeed touching. Reading this brings a smile to my face. It is always nice to hear of a beautiful friendship. Someone who can make this kind of impact on you is most definitely a blessing. Really good friends are hard to find. It seems we all think we have lots of friends until the time comes when we really need them, and it is then we find our many have turned to few. This poem expresses wonderful appreciation and gratitude to someone who obviously means a great deal to you. It is very well written and I wouldnt change anything about it. Just lovely! Take care!
This is a really beautiful poem Linda, you did a great job on this one! And I just wanted to say thank you for being my friend too, I hope we're friends for a very long time! Oh, by the way, I again wanted to thank you for writing "Losing A Child To Adoption" for me, that poem really touches my heart!
this is great because this is how I am feeling with a friend rite now and I did since we met...without going out he's helped me in five almost six months more than so many have in my whole life. it's great that you know what it's to have a friend like this...you really deserve it and I bet you are this kind of friend to so many ppl;) nice write...I liked it alot.
Nice !!!! This is a really awsome poem of friendship. Friendship is such a beautiful thing to have. Soeone to love you and let you share with them anything thats on your mind, bothering you, or thats holding you down. Friendship is also a very hard thing to loose I remember the night of my classes graduation that was the most happy and sad day of my life, happy cause I was out of high school but sad because I was going to leave some friends behind forever, I ll never forget embracing my friend aaron who was leaving for dallas the next day and thinking that I was loosing him for along time this poem is a really nice tribute to all the things about friendship and I think I am going to add this as a favorite..