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    dots Submission Name: Misty Allusiondots

    Author: Desi
    Elite Ratio:    3.88 - 210/151/34
    Words: 92
    Class/Type: Poetry/
    Total Views: 812
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 627


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    dotsMisty Allusiondots

    In a field shrouded in fog,
    a mother deer and her fawn,
    awaken to explore the new dawn.

    Wandering about in this misty allusion
    where everything is quite confusing.
    All of a sudden there is this intrusion.

    In the distance a deafening sound.
    A hunters rifle explodes,
    and a buck hits the ground.

    The air pungent with the smell of death.
    The hunter is tromping through the
    rustling leaves, all out of breath.

    Now in this fog of misty allusion,
    nothing else matters.
    Tranquiltity is forever shattered

    Submitted on 2005-10-25 22:34:13     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    Rate This Submission

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    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      I enjoyed this, and read it as a former hunter. I think every young man has a primitive instinct for hunting. I grew up on a ranch, and was familiar with husbandry and gore, as we also slaughtered and butchered our own beef in those days. I hunted game of all types in season, and it provided a welcome change to our regular tablefare.

    I stopped hunting when I grew older, and now protect and coddle all of the wild creatures. I literally "wince" at the thought of a noble wild animal being hurt or shot nowadays. I'd much rather enjoy watching them live safe and carefree.

    Nice work!

    | Posted on 2011-01-07 00:00:00 | by Ron Cole | [ Reply to This ]
      This was the Bambi story but more detailed. I liked it and thought it made you think about killing before you do it?
    Well thanks for the read!
    | Posted on 2005-11-02 00:00:00 | by whendt | [ Reply to This ]
      What a sad tale! You can picture yourself as that scared deer here. Her life all grand and good, the day is pretty, she has all her forest friends, going through her territory without a care, having a good meal. All is well, then out of nowhere hunters gunning down her and her baby.
    | Posted on 2005-10-26 00:00:00 | by AlabamaFarmGirl | [ Reply to This ]

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