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Because we're Together

Author: BleedingTears
ASL Info:    16/f/Neverland
Elite Ratio:    4.06 - 418 /289 /62
Words: 109
Class/Type: Poetry /Love
Total Views: 2041
Average Vote:    No vote yet.
Bytes: 826


I really liked him and he was concidered one of my best friends and so it was the only way to show that i knew i wouldnt be with him because we were too close.

Because we're Together

Close my eyes so I can imagine that you're there.
We can be together forever and nothing can bring us down
Everything can pass us by, because we're together.
As long as your eyes are glowing and my heart is still flowing, it's
better when we're together.
Silence by day,and we know why,it's because we're together
I'm the happiest girl alive, it's because we're together.
I can fall asleep at night, it's because we're together.
No more tears,it's because we're together.
I'm not lonley anymore,it's because we're together.
Everything is better when we are together.
Everything would be better if we were together.
But...we're not together.

Submitted on 2005-10-30 14:55:25     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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1: >_<
2: I dunno...
3: meh!
4: Pretty cool
5: Wow!


  I've read A LOT of poems on Elite Skills and this is the one that has hit me the hardest...which is hard to believe because I'm a guy...but the girl I want doesn't want anything more than friendship with me and I'm finding this hard to deal with...It makes me angry in fact and I can't explain it..but I use anger to cover the pain..I'm adding this to my favorites because everything you descibed is how I feel about her...Thank you for writing this piece..Great Job!
| Posted on 2005-11-14 00:00:00 | by t0_eazy | [ Reply to This ]
  This is beautiful, it showed me how lucky I am to be with my bf at the moment but if we weren't I don't think I could go on.

I'm the happiest girl alive, it's because we're together.
I can fall asleep at night, it's because we're together.
No more tears,it's because we're together.

This is exactly how I feel towards him, you seemed to take my thoughts and put them into words for me.

I do agree though that the repetition was a bit much, maybe have a different line in between the repetition would make it seem so drawn out.

None the less it was still fantastic
| Posted on 2005-10-30 00:00:00 | by babytinkerbelle | [ Reply to This ]
  I agree...the repetition is a bit much for this poem (although I know I used a lot of repetition in one of my own poems.) It was still pretty good...keep writing!
| Posted on 2005-10-30 00:00:00 | by doanle10 | [ Reply to This ]
  I don't like the repetition so much, but if thats your the style your going for I guess its alright. The same lines over and over makes me not want to finish the poem, though I did. It makes me think of someone imagining or remember an old relationship. So sad Keep up the writing.
| Posted on 2005-10-30 00:00:00 | by disillusion | [ Reply to This ]
  Wow i was flying in this poem thn slowly i lost my wings, i was falling, and i fell. curplank! slumped on the ground.... i went from my head bein in a cloud to waking up from a dream and being in a cream paled colored living room, with my ex watching football.......yea..reading my poem made me wish we were togther but we are not.
Good piece;)
| Posted on 2005-10-30 00:00:00 | by Reva Laine | [ Reply to This ]
  I disagree with these poeple...the repitition adds power, and gives it a specific feeling. The ending is excellent, it is something unexpected, which is quite hard to come by these days. Excellent poem, depressing, but hey, that's what we all are...great write. 5 Stars.

| Posted on 2005-10-31 00:00:00 | by OrionsStorm | [ Reply to This ]

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