Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: The Mothdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: maninthemirror
    ASL Info:    17/m/arkansas
    Elite Ratio:    2.64 - 224/318/109
    Words: 123
    Class/Type: Lyrics/Misc
    Total Views: 530
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 722



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsThe Mothdots
    -------------------------------------------


    I sit in the corner, covered up but I'm shakin
    I"m staring at a moth,I wonder what its thinkin
    I realize that my mind is lost and goin out
    wondering what a moth is thinkin about
    its back in my head now, it's speaking to me
    still shakin,vision is faded, because I can't see
    It's telling me about how it's been alive for many years
    and how its seen me shed so many tears
    it seen that dude hit my dad and how it drove me crazy
    and how that reflects upon how I treat ladies
    now its done talking and I've stopped shakin so its time to fall asleep
    I pass out a peaceful dream falls upon me and creeps





    Submitted on 2005-10-31 21:45:32     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      lol! i agree with Troy totally! this was awesum tho and i liked it! not many people refer to moths as something they talk about...but i guess moths are kinda creepy...so i guess that skool1! ne ways loved it!

    Amber
    | Posted on 2005-11-13 00:00:00 | by Suicidalchild51 | [ Reply to This ]
      the most popular symbolism for the moth is change. I'm sure if you have seen "Silence of the Lambs" you would remember the dialogue of the good DR. Lecter. however the moth can also stand for the crucifixion of Christ. i do not know if that would apply to this write, but i thought id offer a few things to connect "Dad" to the "moth" now the Dad in this context seems to be your Dad and not any spiritual father. the moth also represents death or misfortune so maybe that is more accurately represented in your poem as its significance. i think its a good piece. but the pieces of the puzzle in this are not complete, perhaps you have laid them out throughout your other writes. i have learned that to be the case in solving some mysteries. other things i have learned in that the comments sometimes provide the key to unlocking the poem. but its hard to know with any accuracy until the person doing the commenting has a chance to look at those thank you notes people left behind. also this does bring up a problem for me, anyway, for i do not want to cheat on these but give my "blind" comments. in honesty i committed a "comment sin" when i looked at the comment first then i made my comment for that i apologize. it has lead me to try to authenticate the moth and Dad connection. but still back to the puzzle pieces. one: is your father still alive? two: how did the tragic event effect your attitude with ladies, i believe that is missing too. those two missing pieces that i am able to catch. this is a heart wrenching write i hope your heart is healing and wish you blessings.

    ~mike
    | Posted on 2005-11-03 00:00:00 | by inspirit999 | [ Reply to This ]
      now this was some weird [censored]. u were talking to a moth? did this really happen or were u just kinda looking at a moth and wondering it's train of thought. it was good, but how did u go from the moth to talking about ur dad?
    | Posted on 2005-11-01 00:00:00 | by unknown soldier | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    79466

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    ME written by jjd
    Date night written by expiring_touch
    Hollow Points written by RequiemOfDreams
    Love and Solitaire written by HisNameIsNoMore
    The Last to Walk the Earth written by HisNameIsNoMore
    In the end written by Janesaddiction
    On Loop written by Daniel Barlow
    Ten Poems written by Wolfwatching
    This written by Chelebel
    Trails written by Daniel Barlow
    Dirge of Nostalgia written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Our Cinder Crisis written by SavedDragon
    You Make Me speechless written by elephantasia
    Watch them Die written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Be Free written by hybridsongwrite
    Commencement written by Ramneet
    In My Head written by faideddarkness
    The Promise written by annie0888
    Lunch written by HisNameIsNoMore
    May 31 2018 written by Chelebel
    Unfortunate Reality written by TeslaKoyal
    Blood to Plowshares written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Wasps written by Wolfwatching
    Born of the Mouth written by MyPeriodical
    Pressure written by hybridsongwrite
    Incubus written by monad
    Hopelessly Blind written by ForgottenGraves
    4th Season of Vivaldi written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Tides of Man written by HisNameIsNoMore
    A Fire! A Knife! A Black Crow Calls! written by HisNameIsNoMore

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry