This site will self destruct in 2 months, March 17.
It will come back, and be familiar and at the same time completely different.
All content will be deleted. Backup anything important.
--- Staff
Roleplay Cloud -

Sign up to EliteSkills

Already have an account? Login to Roleplay.Cloud
Forgot password? Recover Password


Author: SouthrnQT
ASL Info:    24/ Female/ Florida
Elite Ratio:    4.51 - 290 /271 /31
Words: 65
Class/Type: Poetry /Misc
Total Views: 1421
Average Vote:    No vote yet.
Bytes: 555



His fortress, his covenant
Bound by the passion that glues us
Keeps us

Eternally breathless
His words, etched inside this fiery vessel
Scorched within my veins
Tantalizing scripture traced eloquently against my skin

Anticipation flickers in the candlelight
Sultry whispers, caressing hands
Prayer-filled promises
Bathed in his life, his being

Satisfied hunger
Quenching his infinite thirst....

Inside me....

Submitted on 2005-11-02 14:19:47     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
Edit post

Rate This Submission

1: >_<
2: I dunno...
3: meh!
4: Pretty cool
5: Wow!


  Nice tribute here. Both touching and sexy. Nothing to nit & nothing I would change.



(And this dumb computer better not tell me I have to write more...)
| Posted on 2006-01-25 00:00:00 | by joeyalphabet | [ Reply to This ]
  Trey is definitely a great person. You have seen that in him as have so many others. This dedication to him was beautiful. Through all that makeup and craziness lies a very sensitive person.

This was wonderful.

| Posted on 2005-11-29 00:00:00 | by Munchie_1226 | [ Reply to This ]
  hmmm...i guess i'm not sure waht to think. i know thats not the best criticism but seriously, i'm not quite sure what this is supposed to be about necessarily. i understand it's about someone you love, but i feel as though it's very random and choppy, almost. it's definitely not bad or anything, you use some wonderful adjectives and portray love well, i just feel as though there's no rhyme or reason to it. (not that i want it to rhyme, cuz i actually dont care for rhyming poems much)
| Posted on 2005-11-03 00:00:00 | by xvacantxskiesx | [ Reply to This ]
  doll face, this is amazing. your words envoke swirling and overpowering emotions and images and leave me overtaken. again, you've written something incredible, a testament to who you are.

in awe,
| Posted on 2005-11-03 00:00:00 | by treybur | [ Reply to This ]
  I thought this was kind of strange, but in a very good way. I got a feeling of immense lust from your words, calculating a level of pleasured torment. Anticipation can really hurt sometimes, especially for a man. Just the thought of it makes me cringe a little. After reading this I think I am about to go find my girlfriend. Thank you for this beautiful reminder of how much I enjoy my girlfriend.

| Posted on 2005-11-02 00:00:00 | by crowded_mind | [ Reply to This ]
  This is a wonderful way to describe a woman leaning on her "lover" to do the best for both of them. I enjoyed the descriptive words that were used and the fact that you never said anything straight-forward. But I think it would have made more of an impact if it wouldn't have been so strong and so short.. I think it would benefit by knocking out some of the strong emotion that was giving so abrupt, by keeping the emotion strong, long and at a steady pace. That is a mere opinion and I will enjoy it either way. keep writing
| Posted on 2005-11-02 00:00:00 | by daniel05 | [ Reply to This ]

Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

1. Be honest.
2. Try not to give only compliments.
3. How did it make you feel?
4. Why did it make you feel that way?
5. Which parts?
6. What distracted from the piece?
7. What was unclear?
8. What does it remind you of?
9. How could it be improved?
10. What would you have done differently?
11. What was your interpretation of it?
12. Does it feel original?