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    dots Submission Name: Wild men of the Wooddots

    Author: Mimevas Lemqi
    ASL Info:    23/Female/Denver
    Elite Ratio:    4.72 - 130/125/64
    Words: 203
    Class/Type: Poetry/Dark
    Total Views: 670
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1495

       I wrote this, another spur of the moment type thing. It may need tweaking here and there....I'd appreciate all comments, for I take that sort of thing into consideration.

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsWild men of the Wooddots

    The wood
    the wood
    lies quiet and dark---
    steeped in crimson blood
    but no one sees
    except the men,
    the men,
    the wild men of the wood.

    Theres the fence
    the barbed wire fence
    naked with rust and wear
    its links lie sharp,
    as a cutthroats blade,
    ready and waiting to tear.

    Stop, I say!
    theres the woodland path---
    a path thats choked with thorns
    their stalks tremble lightly
    with a fervent fire
    a fire
    that thirsts
    for prey.

    The wood,
    the wood,
    abandoned to the shade,
    in the silver twilight,
    But no one cares
    except for the men
    the men,
    the wild men of the wood.

    There comes a chant
    a moaning chant
    whispered by the men
    in desperate need,
    they call to the breeze
    seeking hellish aide.

    ''Blow cruel wind
    within the wood
    rip and fling from the branch.
    Bring us the feed
    the feed for the wood,
    it starves
    for life
    bring us the life:
    and you can rule our woodland halls.''

    Away, I say!
    Theres a pool
    a wine red pool
    which ripples in the breeze
    greedily the wild men drink
    born from the ashes once more.

    Submitted on 2005-11-04 12:53:01     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      get back to me on my other comment:

    I find your stuff just bad enough I like it

    and might make you a project despite

    the rich thought sound.

    just poor enough i think...
    | Posted on 2009-04-21 00:00:00 | by bywayof | [ Reply to This ]
      Hey this is one creative write
    I dont think Ive ever seen poetry written in such form
    Very well Done
    God Bless

    Please if you get a chance take a look at some of my poetry and let me know what you think
    Thank You
    | Posted on 2005-12-14 00:00:00 | by Ronswords | [ Reply to This ]
      Interesting form. I'm not sure if it's a formally recognized thing or something you came up with yourself. Early on, it seemed a bit pedantic, but as you held to it, the rhythm somehow found its voice and worked better toward the end.

    | Posted on 2005-11-04 00:00:00 | by Lost Sheep | [ Reply to This ]
      very creative.
    You really have a wonderful imaginary.
    all of your stories are both captivating & unexpected.

    the end was my favorite part.
    though all of it flowed well & the rhyming was dont well throught the poem.

    the short lines really added to the suspence of the poem & the discriptions were both eery & detailed enough to picture.
    I really enjoyed this alot, you did a great job on it.
    take care
    | Posted on 2005-11-04 00:00:00 | by joy7542 | [ Reply to This ]

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