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White EDITED FROM 11/9 SUBMISSION


Author: Ashleigh Mari
ASL Info:    16/ F/ IN
Elite Ratio:    2.25 - 21 /64 /12
Words: 216
Class/Type: Poetry /
Total Views: 1170
Average Vote:    No vote yet.
Bytes: 1424



Description:


I overdosed Sunday and went to the hospital. This just came to me. I'm not sure if it's that good, or if it makes too much sense, but it made me feel better to write it.


White EDITED FROM 11/9 SUBMISSION



The sheets are white,
Blending in with the pale pasty
Body that hides beneath.
I'm lost inside of nowhere.
I can feel my heartbeat,
My heart is on fire.
My breath is quivering.
The beeping won't stop.
I can't lift up from the bed,
I can't move from here.

She left me alone,
Left me to die.
Where did her promise go?
Where did she go?
If I fall asleep…
I might not wake up.
She won’t be here to care…
My love, my other half,
My warrior.
She’s my strength,
But she’s gone from this hell,
Neglecting to take me home.

The pills are eating my insides....
I didn't take enough…
And I lay here in agony.
I shouldn’t be here,
Alive.
He died so many months ago…
From so much less than I consumed…
But I’m alive…
Kyle’s not.

Everything is so white. I want to paint.
I want to paint it with my blades,
With my pain,
With my past.
The dark ainjul is trapped in a world of light.
A world which masks the darkness...
But is only a temporary distraction from
The dark reality that is my own.
I want out of here.
Only one more night..........
Then the white will die.




Submitted on 2005-11-09 09:31:07     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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Comments


  i'm such an idiot but i need to get my comments up... omg... i'm such a fake... lol. but, i can't get on too much anymore so i'm going to post this same comment about 500 times to get it back up... i'm a loser... my mom banned me from the net because she's a total [censored] and got mad, blamed me for viruses... whatever... anyways...

CAHi'm such an idiot but i need to get my comments up... omg... i'm such a fake... lol. but, i can't get on too much anymore so i'm going to post this same comment about 500 times to get it back up... i'm a loser... my mom banned me from the net because she's a total [censored] and got mad, blamed me for viruses... whatever... anyways...

CAH i'm such an idiot but i need to get my comments up... omg... i'm such a fake... lol. but, i can't get on too much anymore so i'm going to post this same comment about 500 times to get it back up... i'm a loser... my mom banned me from the net because she's a total [censored] and got mad, blamed me for viruses... whatever... anyways...

CAHi'm such an idiot but i need to get my comments up... omg... i'm such a fake... lol. but, i can't get on too much anymore so i'm going to post this same comment about 500 times to get it back up... i'm a loser... my mom banned me from the net because she's a total [censored] and got mad, blamed me for viruses... whatever... anyways...

CAH
| Posted on 2006-03-09 00:00:00 | by bloody_carebear | [ Reply to This ]
  i'm such an idiot but i need to get my comments up... omg... i'm such a fake... lol. but, i can't get on too much anymore so i'm going to post this same comment about 500 times to get it back up... i'm a loser... my mom banned me from the net because she's a total [censored] and got mad, blamed me for viruses... whatever... anyways...

CAHi'm such an idiot but i need to get my comments up... omg... i'm such a fake... lol. but, i can't get on too much anymore so i'm going to post this same comment about 500 times to get it back up... i'm a loser... my mom banned me from the net because she's a total [censored] and got mad, blamed me for viruses... whatever... anyways...

CAH i'm such an idiot but i need to get my comments up... omg... i'm such a fake... lol. but, i can't get on too much anymore so i'm going to post this same comment about 500 times to get it back up... i'm a loser... my mom banned me from the net because she's a total [censored] and got mad, blamed me for viruses... whatever... anyways...

CAHi'm such an idiot but i need to get my comments up... omg... i'm such a fake... lol. but, i can't get on too much anymore so i'm going to post this same comment about 500 times to get it back up... i'm a loser... my mom banned me from the net because she's a total [censored] and got mad, blamed me for viruses... whatever... anyways...

CAH i'm such an idiot but i need to get my comments up... omg... i'm such a fake... lol. but, i can't get on too much anymore so i'm going to post this same comment about 500 times to get it back up... i'm a loser... my mom banned me from the net because she's a total [censored] and got mad, blamed me for viruses... whatever... anyways...

CAHi'm such an idiot but i need to get my comments up... omg... i'm such a fake... lol. but, i can't get on too much anymore so i'm going to post this same comment about 500 times to get it back up... i'm a loser... my mom banned me from the net because she's a total [censored] and got mad, blamed me for viruses... whatever... anyways...

CAH
| Posted on 2006-03-09 00:00:00 | by bloody_carebear | [ Reply to This ]
  i'm such an idiot but i need to get my comments up... omg... i'm such a fake... lol. but, i can't get on too much anymore so i'm going to post this same comment about 500 times to get it back up... i'm a loser... my mom banned me from the net because she's a total [censored] and got mad, blamed me for viruses... whatever... anyways...

CAHi'm such an idiot but i need to get my comments up... omg... i'm such a fake... lol. but, i can't get on too much anymore so i'm going to post this same comment about 500 times to get it back up... i'm a loser... my mom banned me from the net because she's a total [censored] and got mad, blamed me for viruses... whatever... anyways...

CAH i'm such an idiot but i need to get my comments up... omg... i'm such a fake... lol. but, i can't get on too much anymore so i'm going to post this same comment about 500 times to get it back up... i'm a loser... my mom banned me from the net because she's a total [censored] and got mad, blamed me for viruses... whatever... anyways...

CAHi'm such an idiot but i need to get my comments up... omg... i'm such a fake... lol. but, i can't get on too much anymore so i'm going to post this same comment about 500 times to get it back up... i'm a loser... my mom banned me from the net because she's a total [censored] and got mad, blamed me for viruses... whatever... anyways...

CAH
| Posted on 2006-03-09 00:00:00 | by bloody_carebear | [ Reply to This ]
  i'm such an idiot but i need to get my comments up... omg... i'm such a fake... lol. but, i can't get on too much anymore so i'm going to post this same comment about 500 times to get it back up... i'm a loser... my mom banned me from the net because she's a total [censored] and got mad, blamed me for viruses... whatever... anyways...

CAHi'm such an idiot but i need to get my comments up... omg... i'm such a fake... lol. but, i can't get on too much anymore so i'm going to post this same comment about 500 times to get it back up... i'm a loser... my mom banned me from the net because she's a total [censored] and got mad, blamed me for viruses... whatever... anyways...

CAH i'm such an idiot but i need to get my comments up... omg... i'm such a fake... lol. but, i can't get on too much anymore so i'm going to post this same comment about 500 times to get it back up... i'm a loser... my mom banned me from the net because she's a total [censored] and got mad, blamed me for viruses... whatever... anyways...

CAHi'm such an idiot but i need to get my comments up... omg... i'm such a fake... lol. but, i can't get on too much anymore so i'm going to post this same comment about 500 times to get it back up... i'm a loser... my mom banned me from the net because she's a total [censored] and got mad, blamed me for viruses... whatever... anyways...

CAH
| Posted on 2006-03-09 00:00:00 | by bloody_carebear | [ Reply to This ]
  i'm such an idiot but i need to get my comments up... omg... i'm such a fake... lol. but, i can't get on too much anymore so i'm going to post this same comment about 500 times to get it back up... i'm a loser... my mom banned me from the net because she's a total [censored] and got mad, blamed me for viruses... whatever... anyways...

CAHi'm such an idiot but i need to get my comments up... omg... i'm such a fake... lol. but, i can't get on too much anymore so i'm going to post this same comment about 500 times to get it back up... i'm a loser... my mom banned me from the net because she's a total [censored] and got mad, blamed me for viruses... whatever... anyways...

CAH i'm such an idiot but i need to get my comments up... omg... i'm such a fake... lol. but, i can't get on too much anymore so i'm going to post this same comment about 500 times to get it back up... i'm a loser... my mom banned me from the net because she's a total [censored] and got mad, blamed me for viruses... whatever... anyways...

CAHi'm such an idiot but i need to get my comments up... omg... i'm such a fake... lol. but, i can't get on too much anymore so i'm going to post this same comment about 500 times to get it back up... i'm a loser... my mom banned me from the net because she's a total [censored] and got mad, blamed me for viruses... whatever... anyways...

CAH
| Posted on 2006-03-09 00:00:00 | by bloody_carebear | [ Reply to This ]
  i'm such an idiot but i need to get my comments up... omg... i'm such a fake... lol. but, i can't get on too much anymore so i'm going to post this same comment about 500 times to get it back up... i'm a loser... my mom banned me from the net because she's a total [censored] and got mad, blamed me for viruses... whatever... anyways...

CAHi'm such an idiot but i need to get my comments up... omg... i'm such a fake... lol. but, i can't get on too much anymore so i'm going to post this same comment about 500 times to get it back up... i'm a loser... my mom banned me from the net because she's a total [censored] and got mad, blamed me for viruses... whatever... anyways...

CAH i'm such an idiot but i need to get my comments up... omg... i'm such a fake... lol. but, i can't get on too much anymore so i'm going to post this same comment about 500 times to get it back up... i'm a loser... my mom banned me from the net because she's a total [censored] and got mad, blamed me for viruses... whatever... anyways...

CAHi'm such an idiot but i need to get my comments up... omg... i'm such a fake... lol. but, i can't get on too much anymore so i'm going to post this same comment about 500 times to get it back up... i'm a loser... my mom banned me from the net because she's a total [censored] and got mad, blamed me for viruses... whatever... anyways...

CAH
| Posted on 2006-03-09 00:00:00 | by bloody_carebear | [ Reply to This ]
  God i loved this...please tell me who Kyle is...but anyways i agree with the person that wrote this"A very sad write. My only advice is "My breath is steady, somewhat." is a little clunky. Have you thought of re-wording that?

"She left me alone"- who is she? And you say how you don't like the white, that you're trapped, but you also called it an escape, "temporary relief from reality". Which is it? What made you do what you do to get there? "
Very nice. I'm sorry for your losss.
much love
Reeses
| Posted on 2005-12-08 00:00:00 | by Numb | [ Reply to This ]
  Please take care of yourself. I hope that you are able to keep yourself together through writing...

I did like your poem, but I am sad to know the reason that you were able to give such detail. Not everyone understands that life is a gift and that many would miss you if you were gone. Then it becomes something for those who are left behind to deal with... this is not fair to them.
Take care! Talk to someone if you feel the need to try this again. Next time you might not be so lucky!

Monica
| Posted on 2005-11-11 00:00:00 | by mon28 | [ Reply to This ]
  I'm under the impression your world is colorless and cold as a hospital room, full of the dull ache of a failed suicide and the regret of not being successful. Possibly 'she' is you, or at least one half of you, warring with yourself as to how best to deal with pain/abandonment/self esteem issues once and for all. Maybe you feel your muse/will to live has abandoned you to an antiseptic hell and only death will draw the two of you together. Stay alive and keep writing.
| Posted on 2005-11-10 00:00:00 | by rws | [ Reply to This ]
  Good to hear that you were able to post this... But I couldn't quite understand why you were there or what was going on. And perhaps you never meant to include that, but you do mention pills and I came to conclude you overdosed on some kind of pill- however you felt you needed more... mysterious.
| Posted on 2005-11-09 00:00:00 | by RequiemOfDreams | [ Reply to This ]


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