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    dots Submission Name: Naked in the Oceansdots

    Author: cuddledumplin
    ASL Info:    36/ f/UK
    Elite Ratio:    4.08 - 6269/5927/526
    Words: 27
    Class/Type: Poetry/Depressed
    Total Views: 1304
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 163


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsNaked in the Oceansdots

    You and I swim naked in the oceans of the mind.
    Drowning, we hold onto each other,
    and sink further together
    than we ever could apart.

    Submitted on 2004-01-15 11:37:54     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      Ohhh sweet. I definitely like the last two lines the best... saying, "It's obvious, we're meant for each other!" and the 2nd line... almost a promise to stay with together always. I have to be redundant and say how can you put so much into just a couple of lines of writing?!? Very nice job.
    | Posted on 2004-06-12 00:00:00 | by mixedemotions00 | [ Reply to This ]
      if this was a depressed poem, it certainly did alot to raise my spirits...i guess that is what great writing is supposed to do, one way or the other....powerful stuff....cheers
    | Posted on 2004-04-02 00:00:00 | by FallenGrace | [ Reply to This ]
      the last two lines were the main lines of the poem. deep meaning but takes a time to sink in, but how can you write such a lot in two lines!! great talent you have there!!!

    | Posted on 2004-04-01 00:00:00 | by Zu | [ Reply to This ]
      is that depressed, i thought it was funny and cute and cuddly
    that my feeling
    | Posted on 2004-03-05 00:00:00 | by rawpot | [ Reply to This ]
      I really love your minimalist style. You load so much emotion and meaning into so few words,. That is a genuine talent, I envy you. Keep up the fantastic writes. Silver
    | Posted on 2004-02-07 00:00:00 | by Silverdog | [ Reply to This ]
      short but absolutly touching. I like that. good one.
    | Posted on 2004-01-20 00:00:00 | by eve1684 | [ Reply to This ]
      I think of Romeo and Juliet. Nice one!
    | Posted on 2004-01-16 00:00:00 | by hopefloats | [ Reply to This ]
      Wow!!! This was a deep one! Said so much in a few short lines. Very powerful. ...and sink further together than we ever could apart.
    Great ending. Turned the tides in one sentence.
    | Posted on 2004-01-15 00:00:00 | by kblyric | [ Reply to This ]
      short and sweet. i like it
    | Posted on 2004-01-15 00:00:00 | by love gone wrong | [ Reply to This ]

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