THE VIDEO by Atrip187

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Submission Name: THE VIDEO dots

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Author:	Atrip187
ASL Info:	21/Male/Some Alley
Elite Ratio:	4.53 - 81/76/21
Words:	72

Class/Type:	Poetry/Serious
Total Views:	219
Average Vote:	No vote yet.
Bytes:	397

Description:
I told SOmeone she or he inspired me to write THE VIDEO LOL so i did hope you like it!!

THE VIDEO dots

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Forward it plays as I sleep,
Rewind it does as I dream,
Fast forward it will as i smile,
Pause it wil when i cry,
But what does it do when i die?
Will it be ejected and placed gently on a shelf?
Will it be torn to shreds by the VCR?
Will it be replayed again and again?
Will it be editted and remade?
OR will the screen just go fuzzy?

Submitted on 2005-11-14 19:37:35 Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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1: >_<
2: I dunno...
3: meh!
4: Pretty cool
5: Wow!

||| Comments |||
  Excellent write
I love how you compared the human mind to a vcr
It fits perfectly
All we have to do when we want to remember someone is look into our mind and see the beauty that person left behind
A really brilliant write
Great Job
Ron
| Posted on 2005-11-15 00:00:00 | by Ronswords | [ Reply to This ]
  BRILLIANTLY made... i simply love the extended metaphor... it's just so well thought-out. I have to say that my favorite line was:
OR will the screen just go fuzzy?
i don't know why but it reminded me of The Ring.. jeje.. funny coincidence.
anyway, back to the thinking!
Will it be editted and remade?
reminds me of reencarnation, and the fact that the VCR may torn it into shreds is an illusion to hell, am i wrong??
i found one spelling mistake,,,
Fast forward it will as I smile,
Pause it WILL when i cry,
besides that, everything else is fine...good job, it was a great poem :)) keep it up
| Posted on 2005-11-15 00:00:00 | by margui | [ Reply to This ]
  This is a most interesting analogy you have here. Very well written and expressed. I found it thought provoking and curious as to why you chose each feature to go with each part of living. I am sure there are personal connections here. I like how you have questioned what will happen when you die. What will happen to the memories. This is ultimately what I get out of this is that the video is in fact a metaphor the memories in life. This one made me think and that is great. Nice job with this one. Take care.

Lorna
| Posted on 2005-11-15 00:00:00 | by lmz | [ Reply to This ]
  aww this was really nice I like the whole idea and how you related this video to your life. But just one question what is the video about? is it your life? something you love? im just curious to know. I love the part when you say

ut what does it do when i die?

it just got me there, like BAM here it is. and now that i look at my life (as short as it may be) I wonder what will mine do? will it just become a memory that is forgotten or will it be replaced? which is worse? anyway this comment is about you and not me so great write and thanks for making think.
| Posted on 2005-11-14 00:00:00 | by ladydeathstrike | [ Reply to This ]
  This is a really neat analogy about your life and a video tape. I love the clever picture you paint with:
"Fast forward it will as I smile
Pause it will when I cry."
This is a new take I've never seen approached before, and behind the clever words is a deep question about what exists after death..will we just cease to exist, will we go to a different world, will we live again in this one? Its always nice to find the deeper questions in a non-morbid piece. I don't know who "Someone" is, but this was a very good idea, and I think you did an excellent job putting it in poetic form. Very nicely done.
~Jen~
| Posted on 2005-11-14 00:00:00 | by Jengrr | [ Reply to This ]
  Ahhh I have to say you have made me feel so special right about now. Let me just take this moment to remember that I inspired someone and I have never done that before. *takes a moment* Ok but anyways. I have to say I do like this very much. It does compare to life pretty well. You also do have me wondering what does happen to THE VIDEO when we die? I'm guessing you could possibly say that the video is like a soul. I'm not sure how you could use that as a symbol or example in parts of this maybe when you say when we die will it...

"Will it be ejected and placed gently on a shelf?
Will it be torn to shreds by the VCR?
Will it be replayed again and again?
Will it be editted and remade?"

That could be symbolism for a soul there. I really like that. And I just want to point something out in the beginning and that is where you have...

"Forward it plays as sleep,
Rewind it does as dream,"

I think you should maybe put "I" after those "as's" before "dream" and "sleep". It would probably make better sense.

I really like this I have to say. I'm still touched that I inspired you to write this so I feel super special right now. hehe. I think this write is going to be one of my fav's. . Nice job!

Brenna
| Posted on 2005-11-14 00:00:00 | by Day DreaMeR | [ Reply to This ]
  Wow... I do not get this I mean I get the whole concern about after life and what will happen to you after you are long gone and not just you your memories too so yeah... That is about all I got from this... Good write though I like the thought behind it and If helped out could actually become a greater write with a bigger impact because it is a different way to write about the same subject that have been so talked about before... Nice write though real nice and keep writting and I will keep checking up on you as many times as posible...

Jose J. Ortiz aka Josyman
| Posted on 2005-11-14 00:00:00 | by josymanthegreat | [ Reply to This ]
  Many wonder about life after death...here they have it all in a nutshell. Memories, fade with time and those once known will cease to exist from space and time.

Only those who refuse to let go will forever remember a lost love or loved one. And what of the one who ceases to exist...all ends for her or him.

Imagery is stout! Thanks, saby.
| Posted on 2005-11-14 00:00:00 | by CaramelCandy | [ Reply to This ]

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