[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav

  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav

    << | >>

    dots Submission Name: VACATION SURVIVAL(PART ONE)dots

    Author: dycrain
    ASL Info:    56/F/U.S.A.
    Elite Ratio:    7.33 - 51/54/19
    Words: 338
    Class/Type: Story/Comedy
    Total Views: 756
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 2214

       Short story, free verse. This is the first chapter of four. Vacations are never predictable. Amazing the surprises you find.
    As this is a non-ficticious short story, and the sequential circumstances can not be changed, I am just looking for you thoughts hoping you will find the humor.

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.


    Summertime, now due to arrive.
    Decision to vacation, and to drive.
    Money now turned into traveler's checks.
    Safer to carry, may even save our neck.

    Ready the car, load with water and coffee.
    Pack medicine, pillow, everything that goes
    and, of course, way too many clothes.
    Off in delight, not knowing the horrors to be faced, as you will see.

    Time was most valuable.
    Unlike today, gas was very cheap.
    An 1,800 mile trip made in just under 20 hours.
    Curled in the back, I just had to get some sleep.

    Pit stops, only for gas and food.
    The Grand Canyon, "please, let's stop," I cooed.
    To far away, so onward we flew, scenery was just completely blurred.
    Stop to stretch legs? Well, it just never occurred.

    Neck jerking to and fro, was sure I had a whiplash.
    States flying by in a startling fast flash.
    Beaten from the cars constant shutter, onward we
    drove, mile after mile.
    It wasn't very long before I lost my smile.

    Our faces, upside down smiling, were frowns.
    To assure no ticket, slow down through small towns.
    A post stating 30 mph, and then a FULL stop.
    Best you do this, or for sure on your tail is a cop.

    Now Kansas, small town, night time; no lighted store.
    My God has a sense of humor, He is never a bore.
    Prayed, "Lord, please give us light."
    Be careful what you ask for, His answer always a delight.

    God opened the sky, lightening so bright, backdrop, ebony black.
    Flashes so furious, our pupils were unable to respond and contact.
    Thunder rolling, as if angels were bowling in God's canopy.
    Angels crying, tears pounding so loud; never have I heard, how could this be?

    Rain so furious, motor drowned, causing a forced stop.
    In complete exhaustion, I thought I would drop.
    Finally, arrived at our destination.
    Visit his sister, Centerville, Iowa, so far, WHAT A VACATION.......

    To be continued

    Submitted on 2005-11-15 06:07:10     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      the beginning reminded me of being int the truck with my husband! never time to stop and see sites, muchless stretch out legs. lucky if he'll stop for a bathroom, you'd better hold it til he needs fuel! this is cute, and definately not the way you picture your vacation when you plan it out!~~tracy
    | Posted on 2005-11-18 00:00:00 | by tmullins | [ Reply to This ]
      Hee hee! Sounds like the road trip from hell. I experienced one of these, once. I am not one to travel far in a car. I would rather fly to where I want to be. I enjoyed reading this first part of your adventure. I wonder if you will ever decide to drive to your destination again or next time maybe you will fly? To me, it is more enjoyable and this way you dont end up hating the people you went there with and spend the whole vacation thinking about how you have to drive all the way home again. haha! Very nicely written and expressed, I look forward to the next part. Take care.

    | Posted on 2005-11-15 00:00:00 | by lmz | [ Reply to This ]

    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?


    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.




    User Name:


    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]

    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]

    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]