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Author: Akai_Ame
Elite Ratio:    4.78 - 223 /181 /46
Words: 131
Class/Type: Poetry /Longing
Total Views: 955
Average Vote:    No vote yet.
Bytes: 771


I hope the words don't make anyone mad. This is really how the fights between my sitster and i go.


Things we say to each other yet, we mean not.
All the fighting just to prove to people something we’re not.
Why must we go on like this.
Fighting to which there is no point.
All I want is to hold you close.
And tell you that you’re loved.
You may have had a rotten day.
But I’d wish it all away if I but only could.
I know how you feel.
I was 13 once as well.
I may be older now.
But the pain I still remember.
We have come to be on first name basics, you see.
So please I beg, stop the screaming,
Stop the fighting.
Just let me hold you tight.
Remind you I’m here.
And everything will be alright.

Submitted on 2005-11-15 16:18:30     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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  this is good it reminds me of the MANY fights I had with my sister. especially when you said We have come to be on first name basics, you see.So please I beg, stop the screaming,
Stop the fighting. when you said "Just let me hold you tight." This is the state of our relationship patient
| Posted on 2005-12-22 00:00:00 | by sunshinejmh | [ Reply to This ]
  me and my lil brother argue all the time and sometimes i just wanna bash his brains out and put him in his damn place. i try to help when i can but i'm just not the emotional type. this was good and i hope it works out for u and ur sister
| Posted on 2005-12-01 00:00:00 | by unknown soldier | [ Reply to This ]
  Can you believe I don't know what sisterly quarrels are about?I am an only child.

This piece is very graphic in actions and words, but this is what makes your write more meaningful...personal. I am not offended, dear, but very much taken by the inner part of your piece, which is the peace you seem to desire between you and your sis.

I find interesting how you still hold loving feelings toward your sister eventhough she acts in such takes a lot of love to be able to oversee anothers ill-manner.

I only suggest one thing be very careful with grammar and punctuation...I make plenty mistakes, but advise you go over and fix it. Reason being, it will make a more powrful impact and I challenge you to use more descriptives. You are very graphic in imagery and that is a great attribute to possess in poetry.

Thanks Akai,

Love Saby~*~
| Posted on 2005-11-16 00:00:00 | by CaramelCandy | [ Reply to This ]
  hope you shared this wiht ur sister.. next time u fight, and u will try to hold baack from saying words u can't take back.. besides on;y sisters know how to get under ur skin :-)
| Posted on 2005-11-15 00:00:00 | by mimi | [ Reply to This ]
  Geez Lies cracks me up...oh but back to the was very filled with emotion and it flows with ease. please check out my poetry and comment on it! :)
| Posted on 2005-11-15 00:00:00 | by Numb | [ Reply to This ]
  Oh, I'm so sorry. I should of read the description but I jumped.

So there goes that question.

I wish this would post..unfortunately, it will not without a good number of words.
| Posted on 2005-11-15 00:00:00 | by Lies | [ Reply to This ]
  I liked.
I'm unsure if it's written for a friend or a sister but I felt it.
I think it's a common thing to write and worry with; fighting.
You captured my attention with the first lines by the way.
Nicely written, in my opinion anyways.
| Posted on 2005-11-15 00:00:00 | by Lies | [ Reply to This ]

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