Description: One of my friends (who I feel for as more than a friend) recently attempted suicide and was admitted to a hospital. The night I wrote this, I wanted to go there and escape with him. And in this I was feeling a slight dose of guilt, leading to the darker hues of the poem I suppose.
Escape the World. We're Free. -------------------------------------------
I beg these gel-capped tickets -
To take me where the fluorescent -
Shadows betray two week past -
Lack of communication and naivety.
Just as you bargained your life -
With that liquid sulfur, an alchemists -
prize. I only dreamed that what I -
Lived for was your answers.
As the sixth tornado hits the ground -
And rips up the naive communication,
Hold me tighter and I'll read away -
That hospital bracelet and we'll be -
Free.
very nice (but very sad) write. Wondering what the sixth tornado represents? I really thought the image of "gel-capped tickets" was really cool, very descriptive piece. Me like.
a lot of imagery and heartfelt words=picture ur painting is a good un
i love to read how someone else impacts a life.saddness and a longing to be with=u done nicely.
u will have to become more for him=other than the feelings u have right now=almost a mentor/counselor type to help. sometime love isnt enough and it will not be this time=just some opinions 4 u
enjoyed the read.really creative=more so than me i thinks/format could b improved greatley=soley for creative purposes
Submission Name: Escape the World. We're Free.
