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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Stricken Povertydots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: CaramelCandy
    ASL Info:    37 Female NYC
    Elite Ratio:    6.07 - 118/144/57
    Words: 293
    Class/Type: Story/Society
    Total Views: 940
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1933



    Description:
       Author's Comments: There was a rich homeless man and no one was aware of his riches except those who cleaned and cared for his home. He deliberately left his riches to experience the life of a homeless. He would neglect them and have negative thoughts about them. The only way he could find out about how they really lived and what they suffered was to become a homeless. So he dressed as one and lived their life too. He learned that it was a very tough experience until one man had shown him kindness in giving him money. The rich man refused and the gentleman asked him why. The man simply explained that he needed some convincing of the homeless life. The rich man wanted to know if his money was worth giving to a homeless person. This was an actual event. I don't know the name of the men, but it did occur in the station of a train. Remember, those who are less fortunate during these Holidays and never forget that we are not exempt from suffering Proverty or Homelessness. Treat a homeless to a meal if desired.

    Love Saby~*~

    HAPPY HOLIDAYS TO YOU & THE LESS FORTUNATE!!!


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsStricken Povertydots
    -------------------------------------------



    Have you ever stopped to look
    at the old lady without a home?
    she takes cardboard boxes
    to make a bed in this bitter cold
    with sub-zero weather;
    stinging her face all night long.
    ~***~
    Her face flaking like cold ice
    breaking,
    crusting,
    ever so slow.
    Barely smiling she extends her hand
    grotesque glances pass-on by.
    ~***~
    Layers of clothes to keep her warm;
    gloves found with the fingers cut off.
    Shoes worn out from heel to toes,
    won't someone help this poor soul?
    Flip a coin toward her dirty cup
    on this Christmas season.
    ~***~
    Hair full of knots and teeth untouched;
    this is the life of a poverty stricken person.
    Diggin' and diggin'... day by day
    for food in the trash that you and I leave.
    What if this life took a grasp of me and you?
    Would we survive a day or two?
    ~***~
    Here lies a true tale of a man, in the same;
    he gave up his riches
    to experiment the life of homelessness.
    He sat in the station of the train
    and bothered no one for food or fame.
    A gentleman with a kindhearted soul
    stretched out a hand with diamonds and gold.
    ~***~
    The lonely man refused his fortune
    and told his story of riches unknown.
    I have a mansion and acres galore;
    I must experience the life of the poor.
    Why have you chosen this forsaken path?"
    I'm sharing my wealth with those who have less.
    ~***~
    I didn't believe
    there was really a need.
    Convinced myself they were scammers indeed,
    but now I see the hardships of poverty.
    I was blinded by richness
    and neglected the hungry.


    © © 11/21/04, Saby J.R.




    Submitted on 2005-11-20 18:54:49     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      this is a really good piece...yes sometimes we don't trust them...i have seen the scammers too...but yes, many just have no way to make it.

    we get many homeless on thanksgiving at the catholic center ...i help serve there...except for one year..since 1999...and really enjoy it..there are those who come because they don't have anywhere else to go..students etc...and some rich folks just don't want to cool...but for the majority it is the only good meal they have had in quite awhile..and when they say "thank you" it really touches my heart.
    | Posted on 2011-11-05 00:00:00 | by jacoberin | [ Reply to This ]
      A very beautiful and yet sad write

    I have come across many homeless people in my lifetime and have become very good friends with a lot of them

    I have even opened up my apartment for them a couple of times
    It is truly sad how society has closed many doors on them
    Thank you for opening up some eyes to there plight
    Take Care
    Ron
    | Posted on 2005-11-21 00:00:00 | by Ronswords | [ Reply to This ]
      What an outstanding free form poem. Message was outstandingly penned. You captured my interest from the beginning and maintained it through to the end, leaving a lump in my throat. Here in California we see so many people that are homeless. They can't even receive any form of aid because they don't have an address, and a P.O.Box won't do.

    Yes, they become homeless for a variety of reasons. But the one thing is for sure, they don't have a home to go into out of the elements, and make due with whatever has been throwen out as garbage. Usually, outside of this one man you speak of that needed to understand what it is like being homeless, the homeless are not that way because they choose to live that way.

    To anyone reading this comment, please; reach out your hand and let them know they are not alone in this world. Let them know someone cares. Remember they are still people with real feelings just as you and I have. If you have a place of business and they ask to use your restroom, please let them. Where else are they going to take care of their business??? Instead of giving the clothing you no longer need to one of the organizations that recycle them for money, take them into an area where you find homeless, that is probably not to far away from where you live, and give the clothing to them. They don't have the money to buy them from the various recycle organizations. Don't just think about them with charity during this holiday season, but remember they are still in need of someone helping to pull them up by the boot straps in all seasons and all of the days, each and every day of the year. Make a point of making a difference in someone elses life. Thank God for the blessings you have been given and share these blessings.

    This is truly a heartfelt piece. It shows me you have your finger on the pulse of society. Thank you for sharing this with everyone that stops by to read. God has blessed you with the gift of poetry, and you indeed are sharing your gift.
    Thank you for doing this.
    Yvonne
    | Posted on 2005-11-21 00:00:00 | by dycrain | [ Reply to This ]
      this one hit pretty hard close to home. since it does most of my comment will be a relation type comment. I have been homeless three times, two in shelter life and one on the street. I like right out of the gate on the first line, how you write “Have you ever stopped…” and its focus on the lady in the opening. I see semi-colons but honestly I don’t know their function, so I will stray away from those. yeah boxes and plastic to keep out that darn cold. I’ve used plastic to cover myself in not the head of course, I wasn’t a dumb homeless guy. (smile ok?) good thing, I didn’t have to experience sub zero temperatures as you describe in line 5 stanza 1. I do have a problem with my fingers though, blood doesn’t circulate well so many nights I had to tuck my hands in because they were numb.

    (stanza two) the structure here is curious, slimming when you are describing cold that is a neat effect you have going there. the hand extended and the mean glances brings back memories. I knew a guy who was lame in his walk and he had a withered arm. he would stand on the side of the road on an off ramp in Vegas. one night a driver spit on him as he was moving by with his car. I thought “who would do such a thing?” it was beyond me how someone could be so callous. I knew the world was growing ever so cold. sadly it still is.

    (stanza three) keeping warm again that does bring back more memories. I don’t know if you know but if you are really dirty that clogs the pores and helps to keep warm too. I know that is nasty to think that but its true. giving a homeless person a shower and kicking that person out on the street is a good way to get someone sick. but showers were heaven though for the time they lasted. Shoes glad you got that in there boy are shoes the number one thing cause a homeless person walks… everywhere! and socks too those were so damn important, you never realize how important these things are till you have very little of them or none at all. today I have an army of socks I use to go on sock buying binges. not anymore though I have relaxed there.

    ~your grammar and your spelling throughout this piece is excellent, trust me my grammar is not the best. it easier for me to spot other's shortcomings, I do not know why that is.~

    anyhow I wanted to do a more relation type comment than anything else because it means a lot to me this piece.

    (stanza four) hair and teeth I didn’t worry about so much but food scrounging well I had a better time with that then the cold and sleeping on concrete. it must have been cause I was in Vegas and the folks there eat like kings I tell ya. we had a place called the golen steer where about 12 midnight you could go to the back and they would take out the meat that was already cooked (obviously, well they would want a bunch of fellas to get sick) it was rather nice. we also had a burger king manager that was real cool too and he would give away food also a Mexican restaurant. there were kind people here and there. Winchells donuts would throw out day old donuts in the dumpster usually in boxes that was always cool. anytime I came up with enough change id get me one of those real huge sodas from 7-11. I don’t like telling this cause it makes it sound like a breeze it really wasn’t. we had crazies and dope dealers to deal with. crack was everywhere, the guys in my clique would smoke that stuff, very heavily and it wasn’t cool for me because I didn’t do it. I don’t mean doing it wasn’t cool I mean I wanted food and they wanted crack and that is mostly what they cared about. (ok breaking out of this mode because I don’t want to bore you to death with my high class homeless story) back into this write here………

    on the last stanzas here…..

    the tale of the rich man story is wonderful I think everyone should at least spend a weekend, just one weekend from Fri night to Sun night, to get a sense of what it is like to be out there for such a long time. in stanza 6 on line 3, I would put quotations before I and end quotes on line 4 after the period that is after the word “poor” now on line 5 I would begin quote before the word “why” and your end quote seems to be right on. line six the man’s answer to the question I would begin quote before the “I’m” and take it all the way to the end after the period after the word "poverty"

    another highly impressive write Saby, you have a very big heart.
    excellent!

    ~mike
    | Posted on 2005-11-20 00:00:00 | by inspirit999 | [ Reply to This ]
      Ok, young lady you have proven once more that you are a awesome poet.

    Mine is of one opinion but this is what makes me read on.

    See the homeless as you pass, for these souls a stone not cast. just a little something for you.

    Again you have brought forward the eyes of the reader and left an image of what is in the writers mind. I see the lady as she struggle to survive and I also see the wealthy man as he tries to get a feel of the homeless by becoming just that.
    Now this is a story that has been told before but none have penned it so well. the bible speaks of this too.

    Who knows the plight of these homeless souls.
    Just walk a mile in thier shoes with no soles.

    Sorry, its a habit of mine. HE HE HE

    I do have some experience with the homeless myself. I was very young and my father had past. This was before my wife.
    I lived on the street for three months. Not by choice but by circumstances brought on by my
    own stupidity. These people do have great souls. They have nothing, but will offer you everything. They live for each day and what most people think of being poor they are thankful for. How far can you go before you become thankful for being alive.

    Great write again and hope to have more to read soon.

    Greatest Admiration again

    Clyde
    | Posted on 2005-11-20 00:00:00 | by Wisdom Seeker | [ Reply to This ]


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