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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Rebellious Lightdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: mcgovern_xiii
    ASL Info:    35/M/NewEngland
    Elite Ratio:    4.13 - 70/91/26
    Words: 255
    Class/Type: Poetry/Passion
    Total Views: 222
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1159



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsRebellious Lightdots
    -------------------------------------------




      A sparse candle lit room,
    where only mirrors are witness to the memories.
    A slow upward glide between,
      and the hand rests from its soft caress,
      Just out of view, a touch of heaven.
    A voyeur moon hangs low and casts its smile upon your silhouette.
      Some would say lunacy has claimed me,
      I am but a slave to your vanity
      though I know there is much more,
    It hides beneath the surface.
      Thoughts of love and beauty occupy my mind,
      yet love should go beyond that shallow and common place.
      past the edge where it touches the core of life,
      yet fear and distain threaten your feelings of control.
    Somewhere out there in the darkness there is a purpose,
      a meaning to it all,
      But for tonight I will bathe in your soft and familiar aura
    as it joins with the candles and the moon
      to create one more rebellious light.

    Terence McGovern




    Submitted on 2005-11-21 19:43:33     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    1: >_<
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    3: meh!
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    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      Extremely moving piece. I heartily loved it. I really relished how you used slightly erotic words to covey your feeling. I think that not many people are able to play with the language like you did. I certainly admire that. The whole poem provides a unique imaginary that’s quite beautiful and pleasant at the same time. And the ending is like an apple pie you know …"sweet and indescribable" I wish I wrote like you do.

    I've just gone through your poem again I just can't stop reading it.

    I adore the line about the moon "A voyeur moon hangs low and casts its smile upon your silhouette" I think it's my favourite line …. Take care and keep writing
    | Posted on 2005-11-25 00:00:00 | by Ethan Brody | [ Reply to This ]



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    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
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