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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: the risk isnt worth itdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: namesdontmatter
    Elite Ratio:    3.06 - 62/89/29
    Words: 104
    Class/Type: Poetry/Serious
    Total Views: 680
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 609



    Description:
       hmm i dunno how i feel about this one. how bout you tell me how you like it?


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsthe risk isnt worth itdots
    -------------------------------------------


    is the real reason youre here to get coffee
    because i think you have that at home
    or are you here to see me
    because id rather be alone

    the risk is almost never worth it
    and i dont deserve to hurt like this
    and i dont want to risk it ever again

    its not that i dont like you
    or that i hate the world overall
    its just that i jumped once
    and almost collapsed during the fall
    i gave it all
    and ended up emptyhearted
    so now excuse the hesitation
    but playing with fire has already got me burned




    Submitted on 2005-11-23 22:23:22     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      I so understand! [censored], i can't tell you anything i haven't already. I feel like you and i are a lot alike, and the real difference is our style. There is somethign so amazing about how you put thigns as to the way i read them...sheer brilliance and pure talent.
    | Posted on 2005-11-29 00:00:00 | by Mercy December | [ Reply to This ]
      I like this write
    Its deep and definately has a message
    When we are hurt in a relationship there is a memory of that relationship that stays with us
    If we could only look deep at that memory we could find what we learned from it and use that information to carry us into another relationship
    Great Write
    Take Care
    Ron
    | Posted on 2005-11-26 00:00:00 | by Ronswords | [ Reply to This ]
      are you a waitress?
    u get youre point across well.kinda goes from poetic to rant=this is not a bad thing to me.it is very painfull to "jump".the scar left making the next one=well,skiddish about doing so again is normal.you WILL jump again though.

    beggining was nice,some of the ryme was good.
    format and consistency might need some work=all my writes do lol.

    u got the reader to know ya=apperciate


    toyysruss
    | Posted on 2005-11-23 00:00:00 | by toyysruss | [ Reply to This ]
      this is a pretty decent piece. the general sentiment seems slightly... overdone, in the sense that "boulevard of broken dreams" is overplayed... ya know?
    the grammer is pretty lax, like basically you don't use a single apostrophe ['], so that detracts from the overall picture slightly...
    but honestly, it has a very sincere, pleading tone, and i kinda like it.
    | Posted on 2005-11-23 00:00:00 | by mordantveracity | [ Reply to This ]


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