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My Source Of Life

Author: obaid
ASL Info:    21/M/Gauntlet
Elite Ratio:    4.52 - 148 /93 /34
Words: 109
Class/Type: Poetry /Love
Total Views: 1479
Average Vote:    No vote yet.
Bytes: 727


two words-TEEN LOVE!
dedicated to friends(zed,nat,kri,tou,rif,rak?

My Source Of Life

Few steps I took- then retreated back
'cause the right words- I always did lack
I knew I had to tell her-
I knew it was love!
"May i have your number?"
I thought it was another rove.

She guessed my feelings
She read my mind!
"Won't you ever say it?"
"I love you!"- the only words i could find.

I took her in my arms
-I had tears in my eyes.
Her kiss made me belive that-
When love flourishes-evil dies.

Now that i know her
-I feel she deserves better.
She says "As long as you're with me-
I'm alive and heavens come closer!"

Submitted on 2005-11-24 23:51:55     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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  Don't listen to what the others say, dude, listen to the elite himself. You are not too far from getting a 'Awe-inspiring' elite skills rating. But tell me, man, did i miss something?!
| Posted on 2005-12-05 00:00:00 | by Saaber | [ Reply to This ]
  you rhymed and then you stopped. And when you did ryhme it seemed that you tried to hard. Other than that the feeling were clear. And it was good. Just try to you know keep the rhyme sceme up and yea you'll be okay.

| Posted on 2005-11-25 00:00:00 | by Poeticprincess | [ Reply to This ]

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