Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Mirror Mirror what do you hidedots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: smartblond
    ASL Info:    18/F/IL
    Elite Ratio:    3.91 - 97/114/33
    Words: 160
    Class/Type: Poetry/Mirror or Mask
    Total Views: 957
    Average Vote:    4.0000
    Bytes: 873



    Description:
       What do you think


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsMirror Mirror what do you hidedots
    -------------------------------------------


    Mirror mirror
    you do not lie
    you show only what is there

    As I look into my face
    I see what others see
    a tired and shabby me

    my hair is frazzled
    my face is pale
    my makeups smeared
    I look so frail

    There i stand a average girl
    living in this hateful world
    wondering why iím here

    what people see of me
    is what they judge
    without a second chance

    to take the time
    to look into my eyes
    just one single glance

    would show my heart and soul
    lurking beneath my mask
    burried deap inside me
    and all the secrets i may hide

    all this can be seen
    in just a single glance
    just a glance into my eyes
    look and you may be suprised




    Submitted on 2005-11-26 21:14:04     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      Good poem. I liked it, and I agree with you, no one bothers to look at what's on the inside. It's always about the outside.
    I can relate. It's hard for me to make friends because of how I look to others. They see me as a dark, mean, and weird person, when actually I'm just the opposite. I hate that!
    Anwyays, great work, and the only spelling mistake I found was in the fourth stanza, first line. Where you said "there I stand a average girl" I'm not quite sure but I think your suppose to use 'an' rather than 'a'. Although, I really shouldn't be saying anything. I make spelling mistakes in just about every poem I write.

    ~Piper
    | Posted on 2006-08-27 00:00:00 | by PiperH | [ Reply to This ]
      this was wierd. i liked it though. sometimes it's hard to see ourselves as we truly are and it can be a wake up call to see ourselves as others do. this was very good and i hope to read more
    | Posted on 2005-11-28 00:00:00 | by unknown soldier | [ Reply to This ]
      Awesome write. I loved it. It realtes to the poem "looking in the mirrior" that I wrote. I can relate to it very much. People always look on the outside, not whats on the inside :) keep it up
    | Posted on 2005-11-27 00:00:00 | by TwinkleToes | [ Reply to This ]
      nice write...I liked the overall concept because it was easy to relate to...often times someone looks in the mirror and wishes it were deception but it's those who really believe it is that have a problem...but beauty comes in many forms and from your poetry I'm fairly sure ur a beautiful person. this was a good write and I enjoyed the read.
    peace
    | Posted on 2005-11-27 00:00:00 | by silent_death12 | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    82437

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Birds of a Feather written by poetotoe
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (2) written by endlessgame23
    Relativity written by poetotoe
    Florida's Autumn Solstice written by closetpoet
    The Unicorn written by BlazeFlamme
    Love written by saartha
    I, Plutarch written by HisNameIsNoMore
    // Seasonal Song written by ShadowParadox
    The Poems Death written by Mepoduo
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (1) written by endlessgame23
    My Four Seasons written by faideddarkness
    Comme un lion en avril written by Outlaw
    Redemption written by poetotoe
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (6) written by endlessgame23
    to Be like written by KeeperOfLight
    Tartarus written by endlessgame23
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (3) written by endlessgame23
    Suffer The Children written by poetotoe
    phantom limbs written by expiring_touch
    (Untitled Song) written by TeslaKoyal
    Dream written by closetpoet
    Journey written by endlessgame23
    Lost Inside the Race written by ForgottenGraves
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth written by endlessgame23
    Shi written by ShyOne
    Cover written by saartha
    Shut Up written by annie0888
    Still Perfectly Flawed written by armand
    Physician, Heal Thyself written by WriteSomething
    Lilitu written by endlessgame23

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry